The Infinite Gauntlet

May5-IG-480

Pocono Summit, PA – 5.5.2018

Championship Rundown
Grand Champion: Juan Francisco de Coronado
Campeones de Parejas: Rick Roland & Sloan Caprice
Young Lions Cup Champion: Cameron Zagami

Commentary is provided by Mike Quackenbush and Scott Holladay.

Mike Quackenbush vs. Arik Cannon

Cannon shoves Quackenbush after breaking a lock-up in the corner and Quackenbush shoves him back. Quackenbush cartwheels his way out of a wristlock and reverses Cannon’s standing side headlock. Cannon pulls Quackenbush by his hair to the mat as he applies a top wristlock. Quackenbush escapes, but Cannon armdrags him down from a courting hold into a grounded hammerlock. Quackenbush utilizes his own armdrag, taking Cannon to the ropes. Cannon kicks Quackenbush in the stomach. They resist one another’s shoulder blocks, but Quackenbush’s shoulder tackle does the trick. After an atomic drop, Quackenbush sweeps out Cannon’s legs and drops his knees on his chest for two. Cannon throws Quackenbush down to the mat by his hair and then delivers a clothesline. Quackenbush comes back with a powerslam for two. Cannon tosses Quackenbush after Quackenbush ascends to the top rope. Although Quackenbush rolls through, he’s met with a neckbreaker from Cannon, who then chokes Quackenbush with his shin. Cannon follows that up with a Perfect neck snap. Quackenbush is able to get a corner attack in, but Cannon follows up quickly with a second rope dropkick to keep control. He chokes Quackenbush on the middle rope right up until the five count. They daze one another with forearm strikes, then come off the ropes with stereo clotheslines. Quackenbush recovers first. He gives Cannon a backdrop, monkey flip, and palm strike before bringing Cannon off the top with a Frankensteiner for two. Quackenbush misses a Swanton Bomb. Cannon hits him with the Glimmering Warlock for two. Quackenbush escapes from the corner. Cannon catches him with a Haymaker and superkick for two, then hits him with Total Anarchy for another two count. Quackenbush slides out of a brainbuster attempt. Cannon goes to the apron and gives Quackenbush a gamengiri. Cannon comes back in where Quackenbush catches him rolling off the top, using that momentum to deliver Quackendriver II for the pin at 15:40. Quackenbush and Cannon provided their greatest hits while sticking to the classic Tecnico and Rudo roles which the crowd gobbled up. Quackenbush wrestled like the Quackenbush of old, making this very reminiscent of the bout these two would have in the halcyon days of CHIKARA, which is exactly what I wanted. This was so much fun. ***¼

The Proletariat Boar of Moldova & Oleg the Usurper vs. Jasper Tippins {DP} & Donald Kluger {DP} vs. Cheech Hernandez & Colin Delaney vs. Sonny Defarge & Cornelius Crummels

Tippins forearms Cheech to the corner after Cheech breaks his side headlock. Cheech responds with a swinging headscissors. Delaney and Kluger tag in. Delaney gets the better of him with a leg lariat. He and Cheech take him down with a double team, with Delaney taking Kluger’s breath out with a grounded lariat. Crummels and Defarge attack Cheech and Delaney from behind and toss them outside, as well as knocking Dez Peloton off the apron, but succumb to double big boots from Oleg and the Boar. Oleg and Boar dominate all three other teams until Boar misses a Gore, sending himself shoulder first into the corner. Defarge gives Oleg an uppercut. Kluger then schoolyard trips Oleg after a crossbody from Defarge. All six opponents dogpile onto Oleg, pinning him at 5:31 and eliminating the Beast Warriors. Defarge gets the point since he was directly on top of Oleg. Dez Peloton and To Infinity and Beyond chop Crummels and Defarge outside the ring, letting some the younger fans chop and punch them as well. When it ends, Cheech and Delaney double suicide dive onto Dez Peloton, Crummels, and Defarge. Cheech and Delaney wipe out Defarge with kicks in the corner. Dez Peloton slither back in the ring where Tippins pops Delaney up into a powerslam from Kluger. Kluger pins Delaney at 8:40, eliminating Delaney and Cheech. Kluger spins Defarge out of a full nelson face first into the corner. Crummels breaks up the pin and chops Kluger several times. He nails Kluger with a dropkick and a running elbow drop. Tippins deadlifts Crummels off of Kluger into a gutwrench suplex. After a spinwheel kick, Tippins gives Crummels a back cracker for two. Dez Peloton hit Defarge with the Broken Arrow. Crummels and Defarge however knock Kluger off the top rope. Tippins misses a clothesline and gets two sneezes right in the face. Crummels spikes Tippins with “The Worst of Times” off the top turnbuckle for the pin, the win, and their second point at 12:55. This mach flew by with all four teams putting in a great effort and fluidly moving in and out of the contest. Dez Peloton looking particularly strong, Tippins specifically, and makes me hopeful for future outings from them. I was happy to see Delaney and Cheech back so soon after returning to the company in March and hope it is a trend that continues. I had a lot of fun watching this. ***

Trollzilla vs. Bodyslam Bobby & Waistlock Wayne

Trollzilla is the result of The Proteus Wheel’s enhancement treatments on the former Troll, who is now significantly larger than before. The Whisper is in his corner. Trollzilla clotheslines one opponent and clubs the other as they dangle off the middle rope. Trollzilla suplexes the clotheslined opponent onto the other. They try a double team, but Trollzilla gives one the Rikishi Driver on top of the other, pinning them at 0:51. Well, it looks like Professor Nicodemus’ experiment was a success…or was it?!

Mark Angelosetti {T} vs. Mr. Anderson

Despite Anderson’s maneuvering, Angelosetti finds an opening to drop a quick elbow. He controls Anderson by his wrist and gets a nearfall with a Magistral cradle. Frustrated, Anderson takes to the floor. Anderson gets a wristlock when he comes back in, but Angelosetti trips him and goes for an ankle lock. Anderson scurries to the ropes before it can be applied. Angelosetti traps Anderson as he comes off the rope, slamming Anderson into a series of splashes. Anderson nearly turns things around on the floor. Angelosetti however is able to slam Anderson face first into the apron and hit a running splash back in the ring for two. Anderson stops a strike from Angelosetti. He jams Angelosetti’s arm across the top rope and takes Angelosetti down with a clothesline. Anderson chokes him on the bottom rope before sending him shoulder first into the turnbuckles. Anderson divorce court DDT’s Angelosetti for two. Angelosetti armdrags his way out of a top wristlock. The two men collide with stereo clotheslines. Anderson follows Angelosetti into the corner with another clothesline, then does it a second time in the opposite side of the ring. When he goes for a third, Angelosetti catches Anderson and brings him out of the corner with a running spinebuster. Angelosetti strings some more offense together before getting up Anderson into a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. Anderson pummels Angelosetti down after being placed on the top turnbuckle. Anderson comes down but gets caught by Angelosetti in an O’Connor Roll for two. Anderson catches Angelosetti coming off the ropes with a standing Green Bay Plunge for two. Anderson climbs back to the top rope. Angelosetti meets him there with a superplex for two. Both men use the ropes to get to their feet. Angelosetti palm strikes Anderson in the corner. Anderson cuts off Angelosetti’s momentum with a back elbow, followed by a facewash kick. Angelosetti counters a front facelock with a jackknife pin for two. Angelosetti hops over Anderson in the corner and hits the Flea Flicker for the pin at 15:10. I had no idea what to expect from Anderson, but he performed well and had the crowd in the palm of his hand. He and Angelosetti had complimentary styles and built the match to a nice crescendo. **¾

Campeonatos de Parejas
Rick Roland & Sloan Caprice vs. Razerhawk {X2K} & Nytehawk {X2K}

The Closers have been champions since 2.17.2018 and this is their second defense. The Closers are now in Ecuadorian colors to reflect their partnership with Juan Francisco de Coronado, who leads the Campeones to the ring and is in their corner. Caprice’s size proves to be a challenge for Razerhawk in the opening exchange. Razerhawk is able to pull off an armdrag from the top turnbuckle and knocks Caprice to the corner with a back handspring gamengiri. Roland stops a wheelbarrow armdrag and resists a double dropkick from the Xyberhawx. The Hawx do however weave him into a double superkick to send him to the floor. Caprice is sent out with him via headscissors from Razerhawk. They regroup with Juan before coming back in. They catch the Hawx coming off the ropes, ramming them spine first into one another before slamming Razerhawk on top of Nytehawk. Nytehawk finds himself alone as Razerhawk recovers, making him easy pickings for the Closers. Nytehawk does get his feet up to block the Vader Bomb and Razerhawk tags in just as Caprice tries to stop him. Razerhawk wheelbarrow armdrags Caprice to the corner where he lands a rolling senton off the second turnbuckle. Caprice snatches Razerhawk out of mid-air, but Nytehawk schoolyard trips him. Roland jumps in and hits his own partner by accident when going to break the pin. However, the Closers manage to get the Hawx up into the Deal Breaker to pick up the first fall on Nytehawk at 8:04. Nytehawk tries to fight Caprice off, only to get caught with a rope hang piledriver from the second rope! Razerhawk is distraught over his partner who remains immobile after the piledriver. He looks to fight off the Closers by himself, striking them both repeatedly in the chest and getting them taken down with a double DDT. Razerhawk follows Caprice to the floor with a suicide dive. Inside, Razerhawk huracanrana’s Roland for two. Caprice German suplexes Razerhawk for two. Roland confirms Nytehawk is dead weight before placing Razerhawk on his shoulders. Razerhawk victory rolls Roland for two. Caprice muscles Razerhawk up into the F-10 for the pin at 12:12. Two falls was the right move for this match, but the first fall was really sloppy and the second was only a hair better. This was mostly meant to reinforce The Closers affiliation with Juan and write out Nytehawk, which accomplished that at least, but this was a tough watch. *

Infinite Gauntlet

The Rules are similar to the Royal Rumble. 33 participants in total enter in 88 second intervals, with the first two participants starting off. Eliminations occur when a competitor is pinned, submitted, or thrown over the top rope and to the floor where both feet much touch for the elimination to be official. The winner gets a “Golden Opportunity” which allows the winner to cash in for a CHIKARA title shot for any title of their choosing at any time they choose.

Order of Entry

1. Green Ant
2. Hallowicked {LOR}
3. Hermit Crab {CD}
4. Cajun Crawdad {CD}
5. Thief Ant
6. Merlok {CD}
7. Fire Ant
8. Princess KimberLee
9. Grizzly Redwood
10. Still Life With Apricots and Pears {NA}
11. Hype Rockwell
12. Officer Warren Barksdale
13. Ursa Minor in the Night Sky {NA}
14. Jakob Hammermeier
15. The Whisper
16. BLANK {NA}
17. Flex Rumblecrunch
18. Oceanea {CD}
19. Lucas Calhoun
20. Glacier
21. Icarus
22. Solo Darling
23. Travis Huckabee
24. Blanche Babish
25. Kobald {LOR}
26. Jeremy Leary
27. Dasher Hatfield {T}
28. El Hijo del Ice Cream {IC}
29. Juan Francisco de Coronado
30. Callux the Castigator {PW}
31. Volgar {PW}
32. Frantik {PW}
33. Danjerhawk {X2K}

Order of Elimination

1. Cajun Crawdad via over the top rope by Fire Ant and Green Ant.
2. Green Ant via over the top rope by Fire Ant.
3. Thief Ant via over the top rope by Merlok.
4. Hype Rockwell via pinfall by BLANK, Ursa Minor in the Night Sky, and Still Life With Apricots and Pears.
5. Hermit Crab via over the top rope by Flex Rumblecrunch.
6. Merlok via over the top rope by Flex Rumblecrunch.
7. Still Life With Apricots and Pears via over the top rope by Lucas Calhoun.
8. Ursa Minor in the Night Sky via pinfall by Lucas Calhoun.
9. Hallowicked via over the top rope by Glacier.
10. Officer Warren Barksdale via over the top rope by Icarus.
11. Fire Ant via over the top rope by Solo Darling.
12. The Whisper via submission by Blanche Babish.
13. Flex Rumblecrunch via pinfall by Dasher Hatfield.
14. Jakob Hammermeier via pinfall by Dasher Hatfield.
15. Oceanea via over the top rope by Princess KimberLee.
16. Glacier via over the top rope by Kobald and Juan Francisco de Coronado.
17. Grizzly Redwood via pin by Callux the Castigator.
18. Kobald via over the top rope by Callux the Castigator, Frantik, and Volgar.
19. BLANK via over the top rope by Danjerhawk.
20. Solo Darling via over the top rope by Travis Huckabee.
21. Blanche Babish via pinfall by Volgar.
22. Callux the Castigator via over the top by El Hijo del Ice Cream.
23. Frantik via over the top rope by Callux the Castigator.
24. Travis Huckabee via over the top rope by Callux the Castigator and Frantik.
25. El Hijo del Ice Cream via over the top rope by Icarus.
26. and 27. Volgar and Jeremy Leary via over the top rope by Lucas Calhoun.
28. Lucas Calhoun via over the top rope by Princess KimberLee.
29. and 30. Icarus and Princess KimberLee via over the top rope by Juan Francisco de Coronado.
31. Dasher Hatfield via pinfall by Juan Francisco de Coronado.
32. Juan Francisco de Coronado via over the top rope by Danjerhawk. Danjerhawk wins the Infinite Gauntlet at 58:46.

Additional Notes

– Although Fire Ant helped Green Ant with the first elimination in the match, no partnership remained as he quickly tossed out Green Ant by his antennae shortly after the fact.
– Hype Rockwell beckoned BLANK, his former tag team partner, upon entering the ring. The other two members of the Nouveau Aesthetic jumped on Rockwell, allowing BLANK to give Rockwell an Ace Crusher, leading to Rockwell’s elimination.
– Travis Huckabee actively ignored Solo Darling. He did not save her from The Whisper’s grasp upon entering the ring, and did not let her follow up on his swinging Stretch Muffler. However, Travis eliminating Solo was a minor mistake. He went to forearm Icarus, but Icarus moved out of the way, and instead Travis forearm struck Darling off of the apron, leading to her elimination.
– Leary was no longer wrestling in Calhoun’s former jumpsuit. He and Calhoun fought against the Proteus Wheel and in turn saved Babish from their initial three on one attack. Leary had mentioned taking interest in Babish on commentary on a previous event, and this was a first look at what could lead to a formal partnership.
– For eliminations 23-25: Callux and Frantik had Travis dangling over the top rope. Icarus threw El Hijo del Ice Cream out, whose feet clipped Callux, causing him to fall over the top, which took Frantik with him, and Travis fell from his hanging position on the ropes after that.
– Calhoun incidentally eliminated Leary, as when he powerbombed Volgar to the floor, Leary followed as Volgar had him in a suplex position.
Juan eliminated both Icarus and Kim after they fought to the apron and Juan knocked them both off simultaneously.
– Juan gave Dasher a blatant low blow before rolling him up for the pin, adding to Juan’s hypocrisy towards his claim of Dasher being a cheater. Dasher held onto Juan’s arm from the floor, ala Sid and Hogan at the 1992 Royal Rumble, which allowed Danjerhawk snuck in from behind with a dropkick to eliminate Coronado.

The two biggest negatives of this match were how crowded the ring was at all times and how few stand out moments there were. Even the returning guests like Redwood and Jakob were lost in the shuffle. That said, there were plenty of good stories told throughout, with rivalries new and old touched upon, and some foreshadowing for the rest of the Season. All in all it was a fine entry into the Infinite Gauntlet pantheon but not super memorable or worth going out of your way to see. ***

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