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Philadelphia, PA – 6.10.2017

Championship Rundown
Grand Champion: Juan Francisco de Coronado
Campeones de Parejas: Sonny Defarge & Cornelius Crummels
Young Lions Cup Champion: Sylverhawk

Commentary is provided by Mike Quackenbush.

Michinoku Pro’s Kenbai cuts a promo in Japanese. Tonight is his CHIKARA debut.

Kenbai {MP} vs. Kobald {LOR}

Kobald is wearing an Oleg the Usurper shirt and eating a red onion. A series of hold switches leads to an armdrag and dropkick from Kenbai. Kobald does damage to Kenbai’s nose before giving him a pair of spears in the corner. Two modified hip attacks get Kobald a nearfall. Kobald also gets a nearfall with a bridging belly-to-back suplex, and another with a facebuster. Kobald converts from a Camel Clutch into a Gedo Clutch. Kenbai kicks out. Kenbai resists being Irish whipped across the ring. He ducks Kobald’s strikes with lightning speed before sending Kobald into the front row with a headscissors. Kenbai follows with a tope con hilo. Back in the ring, Kenbai blasts Kobald with a missile dropkick for two. Kobald ducks a discuss forearm and pokes Kenbai in the eyes. With a claw he drives Kenbai back of the head first into the canvas. Kobald lands a second rope splash for two. Kenbai evades the Demon’s Toilet and hooks Kobald into a Magistral cradle for two. Kenbai nails the discuss forearm for another two. A top rope double stomp gets Kenbai the pin at 7:35. Kobald looked really good in this match, smartly going for a number of pins in a variety of ways and moving effortlessly from one offensive maneuver to the next. I feel like we only saw a portion of what Kenbai is capable of, but what we did see was impressive and a lot of fun. Hopefully we’ll see him back sooner than later. **½

Cajun Crawdad says the Throwbacks have accomplished so much in CHIKARA. However, Hermit Crab defeated Dasher Hatfield at “The Empty Child”, and both he and Crawdad defeated him again in the Infinite Gauntlet. Tonight will be the night people will remember as the night where they defeated The Throwbacks.

Dasher Hatfield {T} & Mark Angelosetti {T} vs. Hermit Crab & Cajun Crawdad

Hatfield underhand chops Crab twice before knocking him down with four successive running forearms. Crab ducks the fifth but is taken down with a back body drop. Hatfield catches Crawdad coming in and puts him in the Romero Special. Angelosetti bulldogs Crawdad out of that position from the second rope for two. Angelosetti is too strong for Crawdad to back drop out of his headlock. Crawdad digs his pincer into Angelosetti’s shoulder, but Angelosetti still shoulder blocks him down. Crawdad blocks a splash with double knees. Crab pulls Angelosetti into a short-arm clothesline out of a nerve pinch. Angelosetti chops Crab a few times before tagging in Hatfield. The Throwbacks double hip toss Crab into stereo falling headbutts. Hatfield crucifix pins Crab for two. He catches Crab with a punch to the stomach before attempting the Cyclone neckbreaker. Crab sneaks out and gives Hatfield a brainbuster onto the knee. Crawdad Gator rolls Hatfield as Crab knocks Angelosetti off the ring apron. Crab sets up for the Naniwa elbow but Hatfield rolls to the floor before he can attempt it. Crab hooks Angelosetti as he enters the ring. The crustaceans try a double suplex, but Angelosetti swings out and tackles both of them into the corner. Crawdad sends him to the apron. Crab grabs his clavicle. Hatfield clothesline Crab outside and Angelosetti lands a twisting moonsault off the second turnbuckle to the floor! Hatfield tries a running Liger Bomb on Crawdad. Crawdad slips out and sunset flips Hatfield for the flash pin at 5:19. The story here is that Hatfield has been bested by the crustaceans three times, and this makes the second occasion where Angelosetti couldn’t save him. The Throwbacks relationship could be in trouble, but they still are a force to be reckoned with. They’re a great team to help the Crab and Crawdad grow, and I enjoyed what I saw from the crustaceans in this contest. **½

All three members of Xyberhawx 2000 are standing by. Sylverhawk says being the Young Lions Cup champion means he is the fliest rookie in CHIKARA. He knows Cornelius Crummels is a skilled competitor and always has something up his sleeve, but he will use all the flyness he has in his body to make sure he retains the Cup.

Young Lions Cup
Sylverhawk {X2K} vs. Cornelius Crummels

Sylverhawk has been champion since 6.4.2017 and this is his first defense. He blasts Crummels with a bicycle kick as soon as the bell rings. Some Lucha rolls lead to Sylverhawk taking down Crummels with a toreador and dropkick. He overhand chops Crummels before snapmaring him into an elbow drop. Sylverhawk puts on a surfboard stretch, releasing on his own volition. Crummels shoves Sylverhawk to the floor. Sylverhawk re-enters the ring as Crummels exits. Crummels cuts off Sylverhawk’s dive with a forearm strike, then gives him a neckbreaker onto the frame of the ring. Crummels rubs his hands into Sylverhawk’s face before doing damage to his back inside in the ring. Sylverhawk resists an Anaconda Vise attempt. Crummels sneezes in Sylverhawk’s face after placing him onto top turnbuckle. When he gets his balance, Crummels brings down Sylverhawk with a Frankensteiner for two. He also gets two with a suplex. Crummels avoids a suplex. He sneezes in Sylverhawk’s face again before delivering a DDT. Sylverhawk again resists the Anaconda Vise. He strings together a triumvirate of kicks, sending Crummels to the corner. Sylverhawk hits a pair of Stinger splashes. On the third attempt, Crummels sends Sylverhawk face first into the second turnbuckle with a Complete Shot. He locks on the Anaconda Vise but Sylverhawk is close enough to the ropes to break it. Sylverhawk blasts Crummels with a superkick to send him outside. Sylverhawk follows with a pair of suicide dives. He misses a top rope dropkick, allowing Crummels to get the Anaconda Vise re-applied. Sylverhawk counters into a crossface chickenwing. Crummels rolls from mid-ring to the ropes to break. Despite getting sneezed onto, Sylverhawk is able to deliver a 2k1 Bomb. Crummels halts Sylverhawk on the top turnbuckle with a single leg dropkick. Sylverhawk counters the Frankensteiner this time with a super powerbomb. Sylverhawk hits the top rope splash for the pin at 9:29. This followed a similar story to the Wani title bout, where Crummels had a game plan until a misstep allowed Sylverhawk to take over and score the win. Crummels hasn’t had a much of chance to be showcased in singles competition, but he excelled in his role. On top of that, this nicely sets the table for a future Xyberhawx Campeones de Parejas match (which Sylverhawk foreshadowed by pointing at Crummels’ title belt as he left the ring.) Nice work all around. ***

Silver Ant {C} vs. Frightmare {LOR}

Silver Ant starts working on Frightmare’s arm. He gets on a Venus Fly Trap submission for just a moment as Frightmare overhand chops him to escape. He headbutts Frightmare’s hand while it’s upturned in a wristlock. He does it again after Frightmare’s throws a few forearm strikes. So much damage is done to the arm, Frightmare grabs the ropes so Silver Ant has to release his grip. Despite this, Silver Ant takes Frightmare down with a flying double chop. He weaves Frightmare into a belly-to-back suplex for two. Frightmare yakuza kicks Silver Ant to the outside and follows with a tope con hilo. He slams Silver Ant back first into the apron. As Silver Ant crawls into the ring, Frightmare immediately pounces on him with clubbing forearms to the back. Silver Ant is able to maneuver his way to the second turnbuckle, but Frightmare yanks him down so that his back crashes onto the top turnbuckle. After a shotgun dropkick, Frightmare jackknife pins Silver Ant for two. He also gets two with a standing moonsault. Silver Ant avoids a step-up enzuigiri. He forearms Frightmare away before coming in from the apron with a double jump dropkick. Silver Ant goes for the clover leaf, but Frightmare yanks on his mask to stop him. Frightmare accelerates his feet into Silver Ant’s shoulder blades. He gives Silver Ant a vertical suplex for two. Silver Ant connects with a spike DDT off the second turnbuckle on his second attempt. Frightmare counters a belly-to-back suplex attempt by going back to the mask. He nails two yakuza kicks. Silver Ant counters the third. Frightmare avoids the tiger feint kick, but is kicked from the apron. Frightmare meets Silver Ant on the second rope and rips off one of his antennae! Silver Ant immediately falls to the mat in pain. Frightmare smacks Silver Ant before hitting the Friggin’ Sweet Driver. Somehow, Silver Ant kicks out! Frightmare goes for the other antennae. Silver Ant gets in some chops but is still disoriented. He strings a low and high kick together. He takes too long to go for the cover, allowing Frightmare to kick out at two. Frightmare talks trash about Soldier Ant. Silver Ant salutes Frightmare before nailing him with a rolling forearm for two. He tells Frightmare he’s dismissed before hitting Soldier Ant’s TKO. He doesn’t get a count because Frightmare’s right solider is up. Frightmare spikes Silver Ant with a crucifix driver for two. Silver Ant moves to avoid Kneecolepsy. He hits the Yahtzee Kick and the Beach Break as an homage to Fire Ant, only getting two. He locks Frightmare in the Clover Leaf. Frightmare grabs the ropes. Silver Ant wants to bring down Frightmare from the top. Frightmare fights him off. Frightmare comes off the top with a back cracker, the same move that put Kodama and Bullet Ant out of action indefinitely, but Silver Ant kicks out! Frightmare rips off Silver Ant’s second antennae! Frightmare hits Kneecolepsy for the pin at 17:50, and Fire Ant immediately runs out to check on his partner. I didn’t expect Silver Ant to be taken out for good on this night, but he and Frightmare made the quite the show of it. Silver Ant paying homage to Soldier and Fire Ant was a great touch that added so much emotion and importance to the bout. The action became appropriately impactful as the match went on and the competitors showed that they learned from their previous contests. I’m sad to see Silver Ant go, but he can take pride in going out with a bang. ***½

As Silver Ant is being carried off by staff, Mike Quackenbush makes the following remark on commentary: “This is the picture of failure. Not just for the Furies either, but for me as well quite frankly. I’m sorry, Dieter. I made you a promise and I failed.” You may recall that in “The Ashes of CHIKARA”, it was revealed that Dieter VonSteigerwalt aided Derek Sabato in exposing the Titor Conglomerate at “Aniversario: Never Compromise.” It was also revealed their that Quackenbush promised to keep Dieter’s brother safe in exchange for his deed. This means that Silver Ant/Green Ant and Dieter VonSteigerwalt are brothers.

Ophidian, Solo Darling & Travis Huckabee vs. Chuck Taylor™, DUSTIN, El Hijo del Ice Cream {IC} & Ice Cream Jr. {IC}

Fire Ant was supposed to be in the match, but is emotionally occupied with what happened to his partner just before this contest. Taylor™ sings “Are You For Real?” before the bell, getting Los Ice Creams to dance. He creates the Beyonce formation in the ring, which ends up being an elaborate way to attack Travis Huckabee from behind! Taylor™ can’t seem to figure out how to slam him. Huckabee throws some shots, but Taylor™ knocks him down with a spinning back elbow for two. Huckabee scoops him into a belly-to-back suplex and hits a short DDT. Taylor™ exits, allowing Hijo to come in and poke Huckabee in the eyes. He sends Huckabee face first into Jr.’s upturned boots, and does the same to Darling when she enters the ring. Hijo almost does it to DUSTIN but DUSTIN stops him. Hijo apologizes, but DUSTIN threatens them anyways. Hijo is so sad that he goes to embrace Ophidian. Ophidian remembers Hijo’s sabotage at “Aniversario” two weeks prior, and instead sends him back to his partner’s corner. Mid-way, Darling rolls him up for two. Hijo strikes her in the throat. Darling uses her boot to halt Hijo’s corner attacks, then brings him out of the corner with a tornado suplex. Jr. breaks her pin. Darling also takes Jr. out with a swinging DDT for two. Hijo strikes her from the floor, allowing Los Ice Creams to continue punishing her in their corner. Darling gets booted outside, allowing Ophidian to enter. He’s cut off by a pair of back kicks from Los Is Creams. DUSTIN nails him with a dropkick. Ophidian counters a superplex by grabbing DUSTIN’s pressure points and headbutting him down to the canvas. Ophidian hits him with Chocolate Rain. He takes down Taylor™ with a corkscrew enzuigiri, then nails two sets of double knees in the corner. Taylor™ evades double knees off the top. DUSTIN tries to take Ophidian down, but Ophidian drills him with the Duat Driver. Ophidian comes through the middle rope with double boots to Taylor™. DUSTIN punches Ophidian to halt Ophidian’s Asai moonsault attempt to Taylor™, causing Ophidian to land on the floor knees first. The Rumblebees check on him, but all of their opponents attack them and bring Huckabee inside for a Two Scoop Slam. He withstands Los Ice Creams double Earthquake splash and an Attitude Adjustment from Taylor™. Darling unloads with chops on Los Ice Creams and Taylor™. Los Ice Creams shut her down with the Ice Cream Sandwich. Taylor™ misses an attack, sending himself shoulder first into the ring post. With no partners to tag, Darling eats a superkick from DUSTIN. She blocks Hijo’s Stone Cold Stunner and uses him for a headscissors on Hijo. Just as DUSTIN misses a corner attack, Fire Ant appears ready to join the match! He comes in with a flying headscissors to DUSTIN. He wipes out Jr. with a tope con hilo. Back inside he spikes DUSTIN with a high speed tornado DDT. He catches Hijo on the top rope with a super fireman’s carry, following up with the Yahtzee Kick.Jr. wants the Jack N’ Jill Hammer, but Fire Ant counters with a brainbuster. He huracanrana’s Hijo for two, thanks to DUSTIN breaking up the pin. DUSTIN pops him up for a Liger Bomb. He stuffs Fire Ant with a short piledriver but Ophidian jumps in just in time to break up the pin. Taylor™ pulls at Ophidian’s mask, so Ophidian sweeps out his legs. The Rumblebees use stereo hip attacks to knock Taylor™ and DUSTIN outside. Fire Ant and Ophidian follow up with suicide dives. Darling punches Hijo into Huckabee’s arms. She spears Jr., leaving a clear path to hit the butterfly suplex on Jr. for the pin at 15:46. Timing is everything, and having this match bookended by a heavy emotional match and a main event title contest was perfect. In a way, the crowd and the Furies were dealing with the loss of Silver Ant, and Fire Ant returning to the match was a moment of catharsis; if he was ready to move on and fight, the crowd had permission to feel the same. The levity in this match was welcomed and all the comedy landed. In a way, this was the Los Ice Creams show, but everyone played their role very well and it all came together in a nice, fun package. ***¼

After the match, we see The Whisper, The Snow Troll and Mortimer ringside. A video message from The Whisper is projected onto Mortimer’s open jacket. The Whisper says there are secrets in everyone’s past, and Ophidian is no exception. As Ophidian turns around, he sees 17’s mask lying in the ring. The sight of it seems to startle him. He picks it up, shoves it in his tights, and flees to the back.

Grand Championship
Juan Francisco de Coronado vs. Obariyon

Juan Francisco de Coronado has been champion since 4.1.2017 and this is his second defense. Unfazed by Coronado’s slap, Obariyon gives him one right back. He backs Coronado to the corner where he unleashes multiple chops. After picking up the pace, Obariyon sends Coronado to the corner with a Frankensteiner. He follows up with a step-up knee strike and goes for Cristo. Coronado stumbles to the ropes to force Obariyon to release, then goes to the floor to create some distance. Despite looking to slow down the pace, Coronado is tripped by Obariyon into a side headlock. Coronado drives Obariyon to the corner to escape, driving his shoulder into Obariyon’s mid-section a few times before delivering an overhand chop. Obariyon goes up and over Coronado in the opposite corner and rocks him with a clothesline He tries for Go To Hell but Coronado escapes. Obariyon sends Coronado crashing into the corner and knees him in the face. Coronado drops Obariyon throat first across the top rope. Coronado tries to throw Obariyon out, but Obariyon reverses. Obariyon follows out with a moonsault block off the top and to the floor! Obariyon goes for a suicide dive when Coronado gets to his feet, but Coronado cuts him off with a dropkick! A body slam starts Coronado’s onslaught of offense to Obariyon’s back and shoulders. Despite this, Obariyon kicks out of both a kidney shot and a bridging suplex. Coronado drives him back first into two corners before delivering a belly-to-back suplex and wrenching on Obariyon’s neck. Obariyon forearms his way free and pops up Coronado into a knee strike to the face! The two men trade blows on their feet. Coronado tries the Tiger Driver. Obariyon slips off his shoulders and knees him in the face once more. Out of the corner Obariyon back elbows Coronado. After a pair of clotheslines he knocks down Coronado with a flying forearm. He hits the Go To Hell for a close nearfall. Obariyon heads up top looking for the Rapture. Coronado cuts him off and hooks the arms for a super Tiger Driver. Obariyon fights free and headbutts Obariyon to the mat. Obariyon comes down off the top. Coronado moves, but Obariyon lands on his legs. Obariyon misses his running knee strike against the ropes. Coronado kicks out his legs, causing Obariyon’s right leg to get stuck in the ropes! Coronado feverishly kicks at the leg while it’s trapped. Coronado gives Obariyon a few shin breakers before finally connecting with the Tiger Driver. Obariyon kicks out, so Coronado puts him in a figure four leglock. Obariyon reverses the pressure and Coronado grabs the bottom rope. Coronado brings his Ecuadorian flag into the ring. Obariyon ducks the flag strike and once again goes for Cristo. Obariyon can’t lock his hands, and Coronado reverses into the Coronado Clutch! Obariyon prawn holds through and applies a Dragon Sleeper! Coronado elbows Obariyon’s knee until he releases. Coronado rolls backwards into the Coronado Clutch. Obariyon passes out in the hold, and Bryce Remsburg calls for the bell at 18:18. Obariyon made the most of his championship opportunity, looking great on offense while incorporating some new tricks into his arsenal, and emoting when it counted. He and Coronado took us on a roller coaster ride with an actual, sensible conclusion. This was proof positive that Obariyon will be fine on his own and that Coronado was able to get a conclusive, good title defense under his belt. ***½

Encore Match
Officer Warren Barksdale, Jasper Tippins {DP} & Donald Kluger {DP} vs. The Whisper, Sonny Defarge & Rick Roland

Dez Peloton attack Defarge at the bell. Tippins assists Barksdale in hitting the Broken Arrow. Whisper tries a headscissors but takes a double over-the-shoulder gutbuster from Dez Peloton. DP accelerate Whisper into Barksdale’s upturned boots. They then send Barksdale feet first into Roland for several close up kicks. All three men backdrop Roland as he charges.Defarge trips Kluger on the middle rope. This distracts Tippins, leaving Barksdale open for a big boot from Roland. Roland catches Barksdale’s running crossbody and gives him a Finlay roll. Roland hits a slingshot senton for two. Whisper blind tags himself in. He unwinds Barksdale into a slam then stacks him up in a seatbelt pin for two. Defarge tags himself in and swings Barksdale into a full nelson slam. He then tags in Roland, who holds up Barksdale in a vertical position. Barksdale comes down with a DDT, then tags in both members of Dez Peloton. They give Roland a double Code Breaker. Whisper and Defarge turn their backs on Roland as both members of Dez Peloton lift him up for a high crossbody from Barksdale. This gives them the win at 4:44. Dez Peloton and The Force would make a terrific Atomicos quartet one day. That’s really all I got from this. *

Fire Ant is sitting backstage. Ophidian sits down next to him and tells Fire Ant that he’s sorry what happened. They started the Furies so they wouldn’t need a contingency plan to avoid things like this happening. Fire Ant yells that it’s not working. There’s no other option. They’re the only option, so let’s fix “it.”

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