Judgment Day

Judgment Day 500.jpg

Haverhill, MA – 10.8.2016

Championship Rundown
Grand Champion: Hallowicked
Campeones de Parejas: Moustache Mountain (Trent Seven & Tyler Bate)
Young Lions Cup Champion: ThunderFrog

Commentary is provided by Mike Quackenbush and Joey Styles.

Officer Warren Barksdale doesn’t like that Wani hangs out with the “no good crook” Juan Francisco de Coronado. Wani is guilty by association. After tonight, he wants Wani to tell Coronado that he fought the law, and the law won.

Officer Warren Barksdale vs. Wani

Wani refuses to let go of the two swords he wields, so Barksdale rights him a citation for not obeying the rules. Wani uses one of his swords to knock it out of his hands.. Bryce Remsburg disposes of the swords and Barksdale’s handcuffs. Wani attacks Barksdale from behind. After a headbutt he whips Barksdale back first to the corner. He chokes Barksdale with his boot after some chops. Wani tears up the citation from earlier before suplexing Barksdale for a two count. Barksdale maneuvers Wani into an O’Connor Roll. Wani escapes, back elbows Barksdale, and lands a senton splash for two. Wani does some damage to Barksdale’s shoulder before landing a corner splash. His Muta elbow drop earns a two count. Barksdale counters a suplex with a small package. Wani kicks out and takes Barksdale down with a running boot for his own two count. He transitions from a Camel Clutch into a chinlock. Barksdale breaks it with a jawbreaker. Wani catches Barksdale and drives him back first into the opposite corner. Once again Barksdale escapes a chinlock with a jawbreaker. Barksdale gets his first sustained offense with a running knee to the corner, followed by a lariat. He comes off the second rope with a twisting crossbody for two. He dropkicks Wani to the floor. When Barksdale goes to grab him, Wani jams nunchucks into Barksdale’s throat! Wani puts on the Tazzmission and Barksdale taps out at 8:34. This was a good showing for Wani, who on top of being dominant utilized a variety of offense. The nunchucks out of literally nowhere was a bit odd, perhaps even unnecessary since Wani had worked over Barksdale’s neck the entire match, and his finisher is a running neckbreaker. Despite that, this was a solid match with two newcomers getting to showcase their characters. **¼

Worker Ant {C} vs. Tim Pence

Pence arrogantly shoves Worker Ant to the corner in a lock-up. Worker Ant responds in kind. He Beell’s Pence across the ring, following in with a hip attack and then a cannonball senton for two. Pence slips off Worker Ant’s shoulders and schoolboys him for two. Pence grabs a side headlock. Worker Ant tosses Pence off and drops him with a uranage slam. He back suplexes him into another uranage slam for the pin at 3:05. Prototypical squash match.

Sonny Defarge introduces himself and Cornelius Crummels. Defarge says business has brought them to Haverhill, MA where they face the Hermit Crab and Rock Lobster. Their claws may be able to break steel, but the bond of business partners is stronger than steel. The odds are that they will be heading home with four new claws on their mantelpiece. Crummels whispers something to Defarge, and Defarge comments that we (the audience at home) don’t know that they don’t actually have a mantelpiece.

Hermit Crab & Rock Lobster vs. Sonny Defarge & Cornelius Crummels

Defarge and Crummels offer handshakes after coughing and sneezing. The crustaceans pinch their hands, but still feel disgusted, wiping their claws on referee Troy Nelson after the fact. They toss Defarge outside before attacking Crummels in the corner. Lobster swings Crummels into a flapjack and Crab hits a gutwrench suplex for two. Lobster teases the People’s Elbow but instead just chokes Crummels with his claws. Crummels tries a running crossbody. Lobster catches him, flipping him out into a release vertical suplex. Crab goes for the Naniwa elbow, but Defarge from the outside trips Crab, crotching him on the middle rope. Defarge then kocks Lobster outside before giving Crab an uppercut to the shoulder blades. This allows Crummels and Defarge to take over and wear down Crab in their half of the ring. Crab is able to fight his way out of a double suplex and stack up Crummels on Defarge’s shoulders. Lobster kicks out Defarge’s legs so Crab can come off the second rope with a double Complete Shot! Lobster tags in, cleaning house with clotheslines. He dazes Defarge and Crummels with offense in the corner. He gives Defarge an Ace Crusher on the middle rope, leading into a Naniwa elbow from Crab. Crummels breaks the cover. Defarge wins a fight for a vertical suplex with Crab. Crummels dropkicks Lobster to the floor. Crab rolls to the floor to avoid Great Expectations. Crummels notices, lands on his feet, and drags Crab back in for a double suplex. Crummels dropkicks Lobster to the floor again. Great Expectations connects for the pin at 11:12. This is the most crisp Crummels and Defarge have looked so far. I was curious how two Rudo teams were going to work together, and very organically they made Lobster and Crab the de facto Tecnicos, which for rookie teams is not always easy to do. I didn’t know what to expect here but was pleasantly surprised with how well this was put together. **¾

Fire Ant {C} vs. Mark Angelosetti

Angelosetti brushes off Fire Ant’s forearm strikes to the chest. He stops Fire Ant’s alita attempt, pulling him up into a headbutt. Fire Ant drops Angelosetti across the middle rope with a satellite headscissors. Fire Ant ducks a double forearm. He tries a prawn hold, but Angelosetti wheelbarrows him up and tosses him into two opposite corners. He pulls at Fire Ant’s mask briefly. Fire Ant throws some kicks to the hamstrings and Angelosetti shuts him down with a boot to the face. Angelosetti viciously whips Fire Ant back first into the corner, then snaps the bottom rope into his back. Fire Ant attempts to come back with a running crossbody. Angelosetti barely budges from the impact. Angelosetti uses his knee for some more damage. Fire Ant backs Angelosetti to the corner with palm strikes. Angelosetti throws Fire Ant back first into the opposite corner to stop him. He grabs at the mask again. When Angelosetti whips him to the corner, Fire Ant cascades up to the apron. He low bridges the top rope to bring Angelosetti to the floor, then lands a tope con hilo. In the ring, Fire Ant misses a flying bicycle kick, but does hit some running forearms. While Angelosetti absorbs those, a close distance dropkick does take Angelosetti down. Angelosetti and Fire Ant fight for a brainbuster. Neither get it, and Angelosetti mows down Fire Ant with an inside out lariat. Fire Ant counters a suplex with a stunner. A high enzuigiri and a brainbuster earns Fire Ant a two count. Angelosetti chops Fire Ant down and stomps him repeatedly. Fire Ant however is able to duck Angelosetti’s strikes as he bounces off the ropes. Angelosetti however pulls off the Flea Flicker lungblower for two. Fire Ant fights his way out of a superplex attempt. He slips through Angelosetti’s legs and hits a step-up enzuigiri. Fire Ant brings him down with a super Frankensteiner. The Yahtzee Kick follows. He goes for it a second time. Angelosetti catches the foot. Fire Ant counters a corner whip with a moonsault block into a tornado DDT. Angelosetti kicks out of the cover. Fire Ant comes off the top with a high crossbody. Angelosetti catches him, muscling him up into the Colossal Bomb for the pin at 13:49. This was exactly what it should have been; a fight. All the offense was strike, kick, and slam focused, with a Lucha move from Fire Ant here and there out of necessity. That goes to show how intense the rivalry between the Colony and Nazmaldun has become, while also portraying the Colony’s heart and determination. Call this match Lex Luger, because it was the total package. ***½

Chuck Taylor™ vs. The Big Deal

The Closers (Rick Roland & Sloan Caprice) are in Deal’s corner. Taylor™ tries to get them to do some singing but they do not oblige. Deal spears Taylor™ while he’s still holding the microphone. Deal gives him a chop. Taylor™ responds with a chop and delivers a side slam. Caprice distracts Taylor™ so Roland can kick him in the side of the head, all while Deal has Bryce Remsburg distracted. He drives his body weight into Taylor™ in the corner before biting him. He sits down on Taylor™’s chest for two. Deal sends Taylor™ outside where Caprice sends him into a ring post. He throws him back in so Deal can scrape his feet across Taylor™’s eyes. Deal blatantly pokes him in the eyes as well. He kicks Taylor™ in the chest twice and chokes him in the corner. Taylor™ fights back with some forearms. Deal gives him a headbutt and bites Taylor™ on the head! Roland and Caprice put the boots to Taylor™ behind Bryce’s back. Deal uses the middle rope to assist with a stunner. Bryce helps Deal tie his shoe while the Closers go to toss Taylor™ off the stage! Taylor™ slips out and sends them head first into one another. Taylor™ jogs back into the ring and delivers a stiff boot to Deal. Taylor™ avoids a corner charge. Deal however hits a swift kick to the forehead from the floor. Taylor™ responds with a headbutt. Caprice prevents Taylor™ from ascending the ropes. Roland chokeslams Taylor™ on the apron. Deal hits the Tadpole Splash for the pin at 6:18. The Closers hit him with the Deal Breaker for added effect. This felt like a huge missed opportunity for an all time CHIKARA comedy classic. That may be a bit too dramatic, but the fact this was nothing more than relentless interference from the Closers and very little of Taylor™ “doing his thing” shows a lack of understanding for what your audience wants and expects from a match of this type, which I imagine is not the fault of the wrestlers, but the directive they were given. Maybe there’s some bigger picture idea behind this that we’re not aware of, but even so, I don’t think this match should have happened if you weren’t going to swing it in the direction your audience wanted. Disappointing. ½*

Heidi Lovelace has had a lot going on in her life personally and professionally. Ever since she defeated KimberLee to earn her third point, however, the only thing on her mind has been becoming CHIKARA Grand Champion. She watched her first ever CHIKARA show back at the Logan Square Auditorium wanting to be a part of it. That dream has come true, but now her dream is to become Grand Champion. Hallowicked can break every bone in her body, but he cannot break her spirit.

Grand Championship
Hallowicked vs. Heidi Lovelace

Hallowicked has been champion since 5.30.2016 and this is his third defense. UltraMantis Black is in his corner. Hallowicked blocks Lovelace’s first armdrag attempts, but she scores with a headscissors to send Hallowicked outside. She kicks Hallowicked from the apron and comes off the top with a high crossbody. Lovelace rolls him back inside for a two count. From the apron Hallowicked kicks her in the chest, then slings her chest first into the top rope for a whiplash effect. He drives the back of her head into the canvas. Hallowicked resists Lovelace’s desperation Saito suplex. He places her on the top turnbuckle. She headbutts Hallowicked to the mat, but he yanks her leg so that she crashes skull first into the top turnbuckle. He gets two a hangman’s neckbreaker. Lovelace gets her feet on the ropes to escape a modified Dragon sleeper. She blocks Hallowicked’s corner attack and hits the Deadly Nightshade. She drives her knees into Hallowicked’s neck. Lovelace tries a second time only for Hallowicked to send her face first into the second turnbuckle. After Lovelace begins to fight out of a neck crank, Hallowicked sends her head first into the mat and lands a legdrop for two. Lovelace evades a step-up enzuigiri. She digs her shoulder into Hallowicked’s mid-section before hitting a trifecta of running boots. Hallowicked again tries to fight off the Saito suplex, but this time Lovelace hits it. She gets two with an STO. Hallowicked comes back with Go 2 Sleepy Hollow and a senton splash for two. He hooks her for Never Wake Up. Lovelace twists her way free. Despite a forearm strike from Lovelace, Hallowicked comes right back with a yakuza kick for two. He hits the super snapmare and a Swanton Bomb for two. The step-up enzuigiri connects on the next two attempts. The Rydeen Bomb does as well, but Lovelace finds the energy to kick out at one. Hallowicked throws multiple kicks to Lovelace’s head. She blocks one and knees Hallowicked in the face. She uses the ropes for a tornado DDT. The Heidi-Can-Rana only yields a two count. The Yoshi Tonic has the same result. Hallowicked tries the Rydeen Bomb, but Lovelace counters with double knees on the way down. She comes off the top with Chocolate Rain twice. A top rope senton gets a two, so she tries to convert into the CHIKARA Special. Hallowicked kicks her in the neck to stop her. She goes for Deadly Nightshade again. Hallowicked blocks and hits Never Wake Up for the pin at 15:31. On its surface this had the formula for a successful title match; a focused attack by the champion, signs of life from the challenger that eventually lead to a spirited comeback, then a conclusion that paid off the damage done by the champion to start. Even with that formula, something felt off here, and I think it’s the lack of believability that Lovelace was going to win. She was so beaten down and didn’t do nearly as much damage to Hallowicked for the audience to truly buy into her nearfalls. Hallowicked winning with Never Wake Up felt like a certainty, and Lovelace’s come didn’t change people’s minds. There’s also the fact that she just challenged and lost earlier in the year, and there was little build to the match outside of her accruing her three points. She did a good job in showing the effects of Hallowicked’s damage, but then stopped doing so during the comeback, which for me was a disconnect. I could be overthinking things, but to me this just didn’t live up to its potential. ***

Encore Match
Ashley Vox & Delmi Exo vs. Orange Cassidy {GC} & The Swamp Monster {GC}

The principal of the school is in Team Sea Stars corner. Cassidy spits orange juice in the Sea Stars’ eyes before the bell. He’s also downgraded from jeans to sweatpants. The Sea Stars double suplex him. Monster breaks the pin. He gives Exo a throat thrust before sending her face first into two other corners. He misses a cartwheel splash in the corner and Exo crossbody’s Monster for two. Monster avoids a tandem whip but is sent outside with stereo superkicks. Cassidy tosses Vox to the floor. He tries Old School on Exo but Vox stops Cassidy and dropkicks him to the floor. Vox helps Exo dive onto Cassidy and Monster on the floor. Back in the ring, Monster takes over, dropkicking Exo to the floor after sending Vox out. Vox threatens to catch Monster with a net and ends up chasing him around the building. He ends up climbing up the rope net in the gym and Team Sea Stars trap him in that instead! Cassidy superkicks both girls as they get back in the ring. Cassidy sips up some juice to drink. Before he can spit it, Exo kicks him in the stomach and gives him an atomic drop. Vox clotheslines Cassidy after a Manhattan Drop from Exo for the win at 6:00. Any match with the Swamp Monster is automatically five stars.

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