Fountain Hill, PA – 11.18.2011
Commentary is provided by Leonard F. Chikarason, Bryce Remsburg and Mike Quackenbush.
”Mr. Touchdown” Mark Angelosetti vs. Danny Rage
I should point out that Angelosetti has a jersey with “Throwbacks” on the front, although his cockiness or condescending demeanor towards fans is certainly not in line with either Dunkerton or Hatfield’s general pleasantness. Angelosetti can’t seem to knock Rage down with his shoulder blocks. He does however tackle Rage’s knee and delivers a springboard shoulder block to take him down. He snapmares Rage after a knee drop for two. He gets two with a suplex also. Angelosetti applies a chinlock. Rage breaks free but gets met with a leaping body press for two. Angelosetti shoulder tackles Rage in the corner multiple times. Angelosetti powerslams him for the pin at 2:41. Excellent squash for Mr. Touchdown and the right the thing to do for him before he debuts in CHIKARA proper. *
Ophidian vs. Kobald
Before the bell, Ophidian puts the mask he took from Amasis in the corner and tells it not to move. They boot each other in the mid-section simultaneously. Kobald grabs the ropes as Ophidian immediately attempts the Ophidian Death Grip. Kobald goes for a Rings of Saturn and Ophidian gets the ropes quickly as well. Ophidian fiercely stomps Kobald into the mat over and over. Kobald recovers and hits a high knee. A running elbow drop gets him two. He delivers a seated senton from the second rope for two. Ophidian evades a spear in the corner and pulls Kobald to the floor. Ophidian chops him in the back and jaw jacks with some fans. In the ring he continues to pummel Kobald. Ophidian locks his legs in Kobald’s arms and leans back on his neck. Ophidian forearms Kobald in the back for two. Kobald tries to fight back but Ophidian cuts him off with a dropkick. Ophidian chops and headbutts Kobald’s chest in the corner and against the ropes. Ophidian brings Kobald to the mat. He headstands out of the corner into a splash for two. Ophidian chokes Kobald with his sash. Kobald grabs Ophidian’s eyes and hits a chin breaker. His modified uranage leads to him spearing Ophidian from the ring apron. He hits slingshot double knees for two. Ophidian rolls up Kobald but referee Jon Barber catches him holding the tights. Ophidian however hits a fisherman’s suplex and a slingshot quebrada for two. Kobald blocks a split-legged splash with a powerbomb. He puts his feet on the ropes so Barber doesn’t count. Kobald then hits a modified Rocker Dropper for two. Kobald suplexes him into the Rings of Saturn. Ophidian wiggle to the ropes to break. Ophidian throws Amasis’ mask to distract Kobald. Ophidian applies the Death Grip and bridges forward ala the Cattle Mutilation. Kobald taps out at 11:43. I was so pleasantly surprised with how much offense Kobald got. We never see him get a real shot in singles action as I was really impressed by what he showcased. Sure, it was easy to see that he would lose, but his effort made an impression. Ophidian is really owning his reformed Rudo ways too. **3/4
Jigsaw vs. STIGMA
STIGMA looks the same and is still using the UnStable theme song. That will hopefully be changed when he comes back to CHIKARA. STIGMA brings Jigsaw to the mat in a waistlock. Jigsaw rolls him into a pin attempt for two. Jigsaw drop toe holds his way out of a wristlock. STIGMA laughs as Jigsaw tries some shoulder tackles. Jigsaw trips STIGMA when STIGMA tries a shoulder tackle of his own. He enzuigiri’s STIGMA from the apron and follows with a slingshot double stomp. Jigsaw sends STIGMA to the floor. STIGMA moves out of the way of a baseball slide, but takes a few chest kicks. Jigsaw accidentally chops the ring post. STIGMA pounds his fist on the hand and brings Jigsaw back in the ring. As you’d expect, STIGMA’s strategy now involves him relentlessly attacking Jigsaw’s hand and arm. STIGMA does his usual face wash kick, but this time it’s to Jigsaw’s hand. Jigsaw trips STIGMA and sends him to the floor with a low running knee strike. Jigsaw suicide dives onto him. In the ring he connects with a missile dropkick. He hits the brainbuster for two. STIGMA blocks a superkick and goes for the Stigmata. STIGMA hits his hand and hits the Air Raid Crash for two. Jigsaw kicks STIGMA to his knees. He hits an enzuigiri and goes up top. STIGMA evades a superkick. He manages to hit the Stigmata for the pin at 9:13. Really surprising to see STIGMA get the win but not as surprising as the total lack of change in his persona. I guess maybe he’s saving that for CHIKARA? This was the typical match you’d expect from these two. **1/2
Fire Ant & Saturyne vs. El Hijo del Ice Cream & Ice Cream Jr.
This is Saturyne’s debut match. She’s a masked seemingly cosmic themed wrestler. A lucha exchange between Fire Ant and Jr. ends with Fire Ant’s Stop, Drop and Roll maneuver. Jr. balls up when Fire Ant leans back for a punch. Hijo comes in to set things right, but all that happens is Fire Ant makes Hijo and Jr. fight with one another. Fire Ant sends both of them out to the floor where Jr. runs around with Hijo in his arms. Saturyne tags in while Hijo asks for fans to rub his buttocks. It was only for healing purposes, I swear. Hijo goes right to Saturyne’s eyes to gain control. She blocks a hip toss but Hijo side steps her dropkick attempt. Hijo accidentally knocks Jr. to the floor. He takes Saturyne down with a chinbreaker however. Fire Ant forearms him from the apron and Saturyne hits one of her own. Jr. tags in and chops Saturyne in the corner. He misses a few attcks allowing Saturyne to flip off his shoulders into an armdrag. Hijo boots her and pitches her to the floor. Fire Ant tags in and eventually gets thrown out too. Saturyne crossbody’s onto Hijo. Hijo hits her in the jaw, beginning the process of Los Ice Creams wearing her down in their corner. After a very lengthy beatodwn, Saturyne slams the Ice Creams heads together to tag in Fire Ant. Fire Ant easily takes them both out. He forces Jr. to back drop Hijo, causing another short argument. He boots Jr. crotch first into Hijo’s head. Fire Ant then blocks the Jack and Jill Hammer by Burning Down the House. He moves out of the way as Hijo tries to break the pin. He splashes both Ice Creams for two. He avoids a double back drop and dropkicks Jr. to the floor. Saturyne puts Jr. in a standing headscissors in the ring. Hijo takes out Fire Ant and smacks Saturyne to break her hold. Saturyne gives him a few knee strikes and spinwheel kick in response. She huracanrana’s him for two. Saturyne bulldogs herself into a bulldog on Jr. He goes to the floor and Saturyne follows with a crossbody. Fire Ant prawn holds Hijo and crosses his legs for the pin at 16:52. They probably could have shaved a few minutes down in the middle, but otherwise this had the right mix of comedy and good wrestling to keep things interesting. I really like what I am seeing out of Saturyne and that she will presumably help CHIKARA’s female roster expand. **3/4
UltraMantis Black & Crossbones vs. JC Bouchard & Dr. Callahan
Callahan chops Mantis in the corner. The fans tell Callhan he looks like a giant baby (he kind of does) cries to his partner Bouchard. Mantis lights up Callahan with chops in the corner and hip tosses him to the middle of the rig. He double sledges Callahan before delivering a back elbow. He drop toe holds Callahan and stomps on his back. Crossbones tags in to the delight of every fan. Bouchard, who looks a lot like Redfoo from LMFAO also tags in. Crossbones kicks him in the leg instead of going for a test of strength. This happens a few more trimes, frustrating Bouchard. Bouchard’s eye poke does nothing but cause Crossbones to deliver a hard haymaker. Mantis and Crossbones treat Bouchard to their usual double team series of moves for a two count. Callahan elbows Mantis from the apron as he hits the ropes. The New Sensations (Bouchard and Callahan) isolate Mantis in their corner. Mantis manages to DDT Callahan and tag in Crossbones. He easily disposes of Bouchard and Dragon kicks Callahan while the crowd cringes. Bouchard breaks his pin attempt. Bouchard dropkicks Crossbones from the second rope and Mantis breaks his pin. Mantis Mongolian chops him from behind. He gives him the Japanese Ocean Cyclone Suplex and Callahan breaks the pin. Crossbones body blocks him out to the floor. Mantis slams Bouchard. Crossbones comes off the top with a splash for the pin at 14:30. The New Sensations were nothing special; just a really skinny guy and really fat guy doing some moves. Mantis and Crossbones rightfully destroyed them. Crossbones is SO over with the fans and it brings me great joy. *1/2
Dasher Hatfield vs. Johnny Ego
Hatfield pushes Ego’s shoulders to the mat in a test of strength for two. Ego claims he slipped. However, Hatfield is able to win another test with one hand. Hatfield whips him off the second rope. A pair of armdrags does no use as Ego rakes Hatfield’s back. Hatfield smacks him in the bottom to block a backdrop. He hangs Ego in a tree of woe. He brings good fan Kyle into the ring to pitch him a baseball. Hatfield hits a home run and baseball slides into Ego’s face. Ego tries to bail to the back. Hatfield catches Ego, smacks him with a water bottle and throws him into the ring. Hatfield backdrops Ego for two. Hatfield looks for the Grand Slam. Ego rakes Hatfield’s eyes and contorts his mask. Ego missile dropkicks Hatfield for two. Ego bulldogs Hatfield after a boot for another two count. Ego chokes Hatfield with his boot in the corner. Hatfield sends Ego to the floor. Ego blocks the baseball slide and chops Hatfield across the chest. Ego drops him with the Golden Gate Swing for two. Hatfield lands on his feet out of a monkey flip. He smacks Ego and clotheslines him to the mat twice. Ego fights out of the Suicide Squeeze. He hits the Rough Ryder for two. Ego crushes him with a frogsplash for yet another two count. Ego heads up top once again. Hatfield under hand slaps him and follows him to the top rope. Hatfield hits the Grand Slam for the pin at 11:22. Ego so far is the first non CHIKARA person I would say that I want to see back in Wrestling is Fun. He was competent in the ring, connected with the crowd and was the only one to make a true impression. He was also the most competitive so that helped. Good stuff from these guys. **3/4
Soldier Ant & Green Ant vs. Obariyon & Kodama
Kodama does not know what to make of Soldier Ant’s saluting. Soldier Ant keeps his salute going even when falling victim to a wristlock and hammerlock. He turns it into his own wristlock whilst saluting. Soldier Ant Army crawls backwards to break a waistlock. Kodama grabs his antennae to put on an Octopus stretch. Soldier Ant reverses it, saluting while holding onto the move. He brings Kodama to the corner and tags in Green Ant. The Colony hits a sidewalk slam/legdrop combo for two. Kodama pulls Green Ant to the mat and tags in Obariyon. He bites Green Ant, but Green Ant fights back and small packages Obariyon for two. Green Ant gets two with a Gedo Clutch. Green Ant suplexes Obariyon into a modified armbar. Kodama breaks the hold and helps Obariyon trap Green Ant in their corner. Green Ant escapes fairly quickly after Obariyon misses a headbutt. Soldier Ant tags in and immediately is attacked by Obariyon from behind while Kodama distracts him. Soldier Ant also gets trapped in the corner, for a much longer time than Green Ant. He catches Kodama with a Samoan Drop to finally tag in Green Ant. Green Ant wisely avoids the attack from behind, taking down Kodama instead. He hits a corner splash. Kodama kicks him away to avoid a cloverleaf. Green Ant bulldogs him for two. The Colony go for the Ants Marching but Obariyon chop blocks Soldier Ant’s leg. Kodama trips Green Ant into a knee strike from Obariyon. Kodama trips Soldier Ant and is then kicked by Obariyon in the head. They hit tandem kicks on Soldier Ant but Green Ant is there to break the pin. The Colony double team Kodama in the corner. They send him out with Revenge of the Ants. A string of moves on Obariyon only gets Green Ant a two count. Both Batiri members go for the masks of The Colony. They fight the Batiri off and trade forearms with them. Kodama sends Soldier Ant to the floor. Green Ant blocks Kodama’s huracanrana. Soldier Ant hits Obariyon with a saluting forearm and helps Soldier Ant out with the Ants Marching powerbomb/neckbreaker combo for the win at 17:03. If it wasn’t apparent already, the Batiri become more cohesive as the shows roll on. This was a fine display of that as well as the two Colony members who don’t team up in tag matches that often getting a chance to do just that. This was a very fun, energetic tag match to cap off the first show on a positive note. ***