Beyond Wrestling: World of Hurt

Allentown, PA – 3.19 & 3.20.2011

Kobald (0) vs. Johnny Cockstrong (+7) vs. Josh Thor (-1) vs. Matt Marvel (-2)

Cockstrong gives every opponent a free shot at his cock. Their efforts prove futile, even with Kobald attempting to bite his member. They all charge at Cockstrong, but he moves causing all of them to crash together. Cockstrong falls with the Pencil Cock onto everyone. The competitors bail to the floor. Thor forearms Kobald and Marvel. He heads back in where Cockstrong immediately hits him with forearms to the back. Thor drops him with a backbreaker. Marvel enzuigiri’s Thor’s arm. Marvel deadlifts him into a powerbomb. Kobald dropkicks Marvel and slaps him in the corner. He snapmares him into a running elbow drop for two. Kobald puts Marvel in an abdominal stretch. Marvel escapes and drops Kobald with an F5. He drops Thor with one as well. Marvel blocks Cockstrong’s Shining Cock. Cockstrong blocks his spinebuster with a crossbody. Kobald spears Cockstrong. Kobald chops Thor in the corner with no effect. Thor slaps an earring off Kobald’s ear and throws him to the mat. Thor nails the Off With His Head but Marvel breaks the pin. Marvel sends Thor to the floor. Cockstrong and Marvel fight on the apron. Cockstrong clotheslines Marvel back into the ring. Cockstrong goes for the Danshoku Driver. Marvel instead drops Cockstrong out of a torture rack face first onto his knee. Cockstrong kicks out at two. Cockstrong uses the ropes to flip Marvel into the Danshoku Driver for the pin at 6:56. This was a nice showcase of some of the more off color characters in Beyond. All these guys have potential and I’ll always claim that Cockstrong’s character is the downfall to him being truly appreciated. **1/4

Kobald (-1) vs. Steve “The Turtle” Weiner (0)

Kobald dropkicks Weiner off the apron as he tries to enter and then hits a pescado. Kobald peppers Weiner with strikes in the corner. He snapmares him into a running elbow drop for two. Weiner turns around so that Kobald’s spear hits his shell. He back splashes Kobald in the corner but misses a splash to the floor. Weiner fires up as Kobald throws his head into a chair. Weiner throws Kobald into the chair himself. Kobald spears him. Kobald slingshots back into the ring with a headbutt for two. Kobald mauls him on the mat. He then puts Weiner in an abdominal stretch. Weiner hip tosses himself free. He hits a pair of clotheslines and a back senton for two. Weiner sends him to the corner with the Kamehameha. Weiner misses a top rope move. His shell falls off. Kobald spears him for two. Kobald drops him with a double underhook Fame-Asser for two. Kobald applies a modified Rings of Saturn. Weiner submits at 5:05. Better than you would expect, but only slightly. *1/4


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