Hellertown, PA – 5.26.2007

Commentary is provided by Mike Quackenbush, Bryce Remsburg, Eddie Kingston, Chris Hero, Leonard F. Chikarason, UltraMantis Black, and Larry Sweeney.

Two videos start off the show. One is this bizarre ad for Smart Mark Video and CHIKARA. The next is a video encapsulating the last 5 years of CHIKARA.

The Olsen Twins are backstage. Colin Olsen says that as a Colin he knows a lot about Colony’s. Jimmy corrects him saying that they’re ants and not people named Colin. Jimmy has protection in the form of a magnifying glass. Colin says they’ve been on hard times in CHIKARA, but they’re planning to get their first point tonight.

Fire Ant {C} & Soldier Ant {C} vs. Colin Olsen {OT} & Jimmy Olsen {OT}

Referee Bryce Remsburg apprehends the Olsen Twins’ magnifying glass before the bell. Colin goes after Fire Ant’s leg. Fire Ant avoids a few of Colin’s moves before giving him a fireman’s carry. He sends Colin into the corner with the Stop, Drop, and Roll. Colin escapes to the floor. Jimmy and Soldier Ant tag in. Jimmy tries to squish Soldier Ant, but Soldier Ant avoids them and gives Jimmy a stomp of his own. He suplexes Jimmy and elbows him in the corner. He gets two with a crossbody. Jimmy retreats to the floor. Both Olsens come in to attack The Colony. The Colony come back with forearms. They dropkick the Olsens to the floor. Fire Ant and Colin fight on the floor. In the ring Soldier Ant utilizes a saluting headscissors on Jimmy. Colin grabs Jimmy so he can’t be taken down. With Fire Ant recovering on the floor the Olsens are able to isolate Soldier Ant. Soldier Ant avoids being stomped on. The Olsens accidentally kick each other. Soldier Ant takes their feet out and dropkicks them simultaneously. Fire Ant comes in with a high crossbody to them both. He fireman carry’s Jimmy for two. He tries a quesadora but gets thrown face first to the mat. Colin leapfrogs over Jimmy for a legdrop onto Fire Ant. They try taking Soldier Ant off the top rope. He hangs Jimmy in a tree of woe. Colin sits on his shoulders. Fire Ant brings Colin down with a skyscraper Frankensteiner! Soldier Ant follows up with a diving saluting headbutt for the pin at 7:59. Short but sweet. Both teams are really coming into their own and that finish was boss. **½

Brodie Lee doesn’t really know what an equinox is, but he knows last time he faced Equinox that he lost. It’s his destiny to beat Equinox tonight. He knows CHIKARA has a Young Bears Cup tournament coming up and feels that his attributes make him tailor made for that tournament. He’s corrected by someone off screen, but regardless, it’s time for him to do work.

Equinox vs. Brodie Lee

This is a rematch from “Time Will Prove Everything.” As soon as Equinox jumps into the ring, Lee gives him a belly-to-back suplex for two. He throws chops and strikes on the floor. Back in the ring he drops a knee for two. As Equinox tries to fight back, Lee kicks him in the face. Equinox escapes a running Liger Bomb. He snaps off an armdrag. Lee does the deal with a Slingshot Falcon Arrow to counter a small package, the same move Equinox used to beat him in March. He lights up Equinox with chops in the corner before tossing him across the ring by his mask. Lee pops him up and Equinox counters with a huracanrana for two. He tries a crossbody. Lee catches him and drops him with a TKO. The running Liger Bomb gets him the win at 3:25. That was fun and spirited while it lasted. You could tell even in his silly gimmick that Lee was destined for bigger things. *½

Shayne Hawke declares that he hates video games. He doesn’t care if that upsets some of the CHIKARMY. He claims he was ostracized as a kid for not playing Mortal Kombat 3 and how it had a big effect on his self-esteem. Player Uno represents all the kids who made fun of him as a kid, so he plans to defeat him tonight for some retribution.

Player Uno vs. Shayne Hawke

We start off with a wristlock exchange. After a Lucha exchange Uno backdrops Hawke to the floor. Uno follows with a suicide dive. In the ring Uno gives Hawke a backbreaker and a senton for two. He uses some E Honda slaps. Hawke clotheslines him into the corner. He stomps on Uno’s chest. He gets two with a superkick. He goes for a corner attack. Uno catches him with a Michinoku Driver for two. He gives Hawke a running knee in the corner. Uno tries the Gomba Stomp but Hawke shakes the ropes. Hawke then gives him the Tribute to Professionalism for two. Uno kicks away a strike. He strings a fisherman’s suplex and a Blue Thunder Bomb together. Hawke kicks out. He gives Uno a jumping neckbreaker. Hawke rolls Uno into the ropes with a snapmare driver. He leaps onto Uno’s shoulders. Uno drops him with the Game Genie. The Bubble Bobble Buster is only good for a two count. He misses the Goomba Stomp. Hawke drops him with a tornado DDT. He comes off the top with a Swanton for two. Uno counters a corner boot with an enzuigiri. Hawke pauses Uno on the apron to avoid a Falcon Punch. Hawke carries Uno to the floor while he’s paused in the hopes of a count out victory. Worker Ant unpauses him just in time for Uno to run in and break the 20 count. However, Hawke sweeps his legs, pauses him again, and pins him for the win at 9:49. That was a fabulous ending. Both guys have clearly worked together before and made for good opponents. **½

Worker Ant says The Colony has been a roll. He’ll keep that roll going tonight when he defeats Hydra. He plans to prove that Hydra can’t wrestle his way out of a wet paper bag.

Worker Ant {C} vs. Hydra {ONT}

UltraMantis Black is in Hydra’s corner. Uno is still paused in the ring during the entrances. Worker Ant unpauses him. Uno is confused but Bryce informs him that his match is over and that he lost. Hydra stomps Worker Ant’s feet in a test of strength. Worker Ant escapes leaving Hydra knuckles deep into the canvas. Worker Ant goes for some quick pins but can’t get a three. Hydra takes a backdrop and slam. Worker Ant nails a lariat. He drops a knee onto Hydra’s face for two. Hydra sends Worker Ant to the floor so Mantis can get in some strikes. Hydra does a Vader Bomb from the bottom rope. When that doesn’t get him a pin he puts on the Kona Clutch. He then puts on the Hydra Lock which Bryce somehow gets caught up in. Bryce argues with Hydra until Worker Ant dropkicks Hydra. He knee strikes Hydra in the corner. Mantis grabs Worker Ant’s foot, Hydra knocks him down with a flying forearm. Hydra gets sent to the floor. Worker Ant dives onto both him and Mantis. He then pulls a giant paper bag out from under the ring! He puts the bag onto Hydra to prove his point from earlier. Worker Ant does a moonsault block onto Hydra and gets the pin at 8:33. Really none of the wrestling here mattered, it was all about the finish which the crowd loved. Everything else was alright. *½

Shane Storm vs. Mitch Ryder

Ryder attacks Storm with forearms and elbows. Storm back elbows Ryder and gives him a hip toss. He holds onto the arm after an armdrag. Ryder gives him a body slam. Storm brings him right back down in an armbar. Ryder throws a forearm when they get back to the feet. Storm again armdrags him into the armbar. Ryder backs him to the corner for some chops. Strom fires back with his own chops. He sends Ryder into the corner. Ryder comes out with a clothesline for two. He chokes Storm with a chain out of the referee’s sight. Referee Matt Dillon catches Ryder with it. He tosses it to Storm. Storm throws it away and Ryder rolls him up for two. Storm fires up with some forearms. He nails a dropkick for two. Ryder sends Storm sternum first into the corner. Ryder rolls up Storm and holds his tights for 7:11. Really the only noteworthy thing was Chris Hero putting Ryder over on commentary. The rest was very elementary. *

Larry Sweeney makes his way to the ring and gives Ryder a hug. On behalf of Chris Hero, Sweeney offers an invitation for Ryder to join the Kings of Wrestling. Ryder accepts the invitation with honor. He tells that Chris Hero that he can get the job done. As Hero and Ryder embrace, Sweeney brings out Claudio Castagnoli, who after his loss to Chris Hero at “Rey de Voladores” is forced to once again be a member of the Kings of Wrestling. Claudio is very upset about his situation.

Lince Dorado & El Pantera vs. Larry Sweeney {KOW} & Claudio Castagnoli {KOW}

Sweeney tags out before he and Pantera even lock up. Dorado tags in as well. He and Claudio fight for control. Claudio drops him on his chest and stomach. Sweeney is hesitant to mix it up with Pantera. Sweeney grabs his hair which Sweeney doesn’t appreciate. Pantera sweeps out his legs. Dorado grabs Sweeney’s hair from the apron. Sweeney rolls to his corner and tags in Claudio. Claudio goes for a backbreaker. Pantera counters with an armdrag. Claudio chops him on the second rope. Pantera sends him to the floor in a neckscissors. Sweeney shoves Dorado down twice. They criss-cross the ropes. Dorado rolls out but Sweeney keeps going. Dorado comes back in and trips Sweeney into a back senton. Sweeney throws him shoulder first into the ring post. The Kings of Wrestling make frequent tags to get in some strikes. Claudio pitches Dorado to the floor and attacks Pantera as he comes in. Sweeney brings in Dorado and the attack on him continues. Dorado is able to dropkick Sweeney off the apron when Claudio whips him across the ring. Pantera assists Dorado with a headscissors to send Cluadio to the floor. Pantera dives onto Sweeney while Dorado dives onto Claudio. On the apron Sweeney throws the luchadores heads togethers. After Claudio and Sweeney pose, the luchadores try double sunset flips. Then Pantera assists Dorado with a London bridge on both guys. Sweeney and Claudio try to do a London bridge themselves but it fails. They’re dropkicked back out to the floor. Claudio clotheslines Dorado out. He gives Pantera the Match Killer. Dorado breaks the pin. Claudio and Pantera end up on the floor. Sweeney drops an elbow. Dorado kicks him in the face and gets two with a Lynxsault. Sweeney throws him face first into the second turnbuckle. A fisherman’s suplex earns a two count. Sweeney holds Dorado. Claudio accidentally uppercuts Sweeney! Pantera dropkicks Claudio out and Dorado pins Sweeney for the pin at 15:38. The dynamic for Sweeney and Claudio was fun. They’re both naturals when it comes to facing luchadores so this was all good fun. **¾

Max Boyer says after he wins tonight, he will have had the most successful Young Lions Cup defenses. However, he’s fed up for being compared to Dynamite Kid and Chris Benoit and blames 2.0 for those comparisons. He’s always wanted to be the first Max Boyer. Having the YLC record he feels will propel him into the main event.

Young Lions Cup
Max Boyer (Champion) vs. Create-A-Wrestler

Boyer snapmares Wrestler out of a wristlock. He gives Wrestler a Perfect neck snap and a dropkick. Wrestler comes off the ropes with a crossbody. He rolls up Boyer for two. Boyer brings Wrestler up onto his shoulders. Wrestler brings him down in a crucifix pin. Boyer stomps and punches Wrestler in the corner. Wrestler tries a sunset flip. Boyer kicks out, so Wrestler divorce courts his arm. Boyer responds with a butterfly suplex, purposefully causing Wrestler to land on his arm. He gives Wrestler a Razor’s Edge into the corner. Boyer gives him a belly-to-back superplex. Boyer pulls up Wrestler’s arm to stop the three count. He wants to win with the Lifestyle. Boyer pulls it off for the win at 4:39. Geez, lots of short matches on this show. Basically an extended squash and just an excuse for Boyer to get another YLC defense under his belt. Chris Hero is applauding Boyer from the aisle. *

F.I.S.T. (Icarus & Gran Akuma) hit the ring. The fans boo Icarus vociferously. He speaks through their boos, saying that he and Akuma have been watching Boyer night after night and have seen him successfully defend his YLC multiple times. He extends an invitation for Max Boyer to join the Kings of Wrestling. Boyer accepts and Hero does not look pleased that F.I.S.T. extended that invite. He heads to the back while Boyer leaves with the Campeones de Parejas.

Eddie Kingston reminds that the last time he and Hallowicked met they didn’t even have a match. The outcome of the encounter, however, was Kingston leaving Hallowicked lying on his back. Kingston has a problem saying that Hallowicked is the best CHIKARA student because he’s never defeated him. Kingston plans to end the myth of Hallowicked during their feud.

Hallowicked {I} vs. Eddie Kingston {BO}

Kingston waits in the aisle for Hallowicked just like he did in Philly. Hallowicked’s smarter than that and enters the ring through the back door. Kingston is hesitant to get in the ring. When he does, Hallowicked nails him with punches, forearms, and stomps. Kingston goes to the floor. Hallowicked suicide dives after him. Back in the ring, Kingston catches Hallowicked with a belly-to-belly suplex. Back on the floor slaps to the face are traded. They fight for a suplex on the floor. Hallowicked ends up giving it to Kingston. Kingston grabs at Hallowicked’s eyes when he tries picking Kingston up. In the ring he stomps on Hallowicked’s chest. He bites on the stem of his mask. Hallowicked goes for a step-up Frankensteier. Kingston shoves him off and forearms him in the face. Kingston’s eyes show pain in his back as he goes up top. He tries a frog splash but ends up eating the canvas. Hallowicked gets in some clotheslines and a high knee. He blasts Kingston with a yakuza kick for two. Kingston tries one of his own. Hallowicked evades it, chops up Kingston neck, and gives him a step-up enzuigiri. He tries another yakuza kick. Kingston counters with an STO. Kingston rips Hallowicked’s mask apart. Referee Bryce Remsburg calls for the bell at 7:47, giving Hallowicked the win by DQ. I love this feud. It’s so heated and over a very real, unique issue. These two tore into one another and left me wanting more. That’s a great success. ***

Gran Akuma says every since he and Icarus won the Campeones de Parejas they have had a target on their back. Leonard F. Chikarason and Bob Saget have been sending them team after team and now tonight they face a unit from Kageki Pro. Icarus says he couldn’t find their opponents on the internet anywhere,

Icarus {F} & Gran Akuma {F} vs. Dragon Yuki {PWK} & Kaggra {PWK}

Icarus applies pressure to Yuki’s legs. Yuki trips him into and splashes onto his ankle. Icarus puts on a cross armbreaker. Yuki gets the ropes. Icarus puts on a headscissors which Yuki nips up out of. Kaggra and Akuma pick up the pace. Kaggra takes him down with a headscissors and quebradora backbreaker. He drops a knee and tags in Yuki. He and Kaggra back elbow Akuma. Yuki gets two with a flip senton. Kaggra gets in some strikes before Yuki splashes Akuma in the corner. Akuma flips over Kaggra. He gives him a sole butt and fallaway kick. Icarus tags in and delivers a senton. F.I.S.T. keep on Kaggra until he catches Akuma with an enzuigiri. Yuki slams Akuma and side slams Icarus. He gives Icarus a fisherman’s suplex for two. Akuma breaks his pin when Yuki hits a Michinoku Driver. Kaggra lariats Icarus. He moonsaults off the second rope, then does a twisting senton off the top rope. Akuma once again breaks the count. Yuki tosses him out. Kaggra gives Icarus a Death Valley Driver. Yuki misses a moonsault. Akuma gives Yuki a tornado DDT. He comes off the top with a frog splash. Kaggra dives in. He and Akuma go strike for kick. Akuma does the deal with a Falcon Arrow. Icarus follows up with a Shiranui. Akuma moonsaults onto Yuki on the floor. Icarus gives Kaggra the Wings of Icarus for the pin at 11:01. Yuki is notorious for putting in crummy performances in CHIKARA but this was shockingly decent. Kaggra was much better than him and worked really well with Akuma which made for some fun moments. Nothing spectacular or memorable but a solid showcase for the outsiders. **½

Chris Hero takes us back on a history lesson with him and Mike Quackenbush. He says Mike has been relentless on getting a singles match for two years, even following him to Germany to try and get it. Hero says that Mike doesn’t deserve it. A vision came to him when he defeated Claudio Castagnoli last month; that he is so much better than Mike that he was willing to grant him a match. He proves his supremacy over Quackenbush and CHIKARA tonight.

Mike Quackenbush vs. Chris Hero {KOW}

Both men stare each other down. Hero pokes Quackenbush in the chest. Quackenbush takes him down and rolls him into a pinning predicament. Feeling embarrassed, Hero throws a forearm. Quackenbush responds in kind. He uses the ropes for an armdrag and puts on an Octopus stretch. They each dropkick one another out of a sunset flip. Quackenbush drives his knees into Hero’s chest for two. He comes off the top rope with an armdrag, then cascades into another. Hero tosses Quackenbush across the room in an atomic drop position for two. He throws forearms to Quackenbush’s back. Hero tries rolling into a senton. Quackenbush moves and hits one of his own. Hero tags him with a rolling elbow for two. He applies pressure to Quackenbush’s legs and hamstrings. When he escapes. Hero drops him stomach first onto the top rope for two. Hero spins him around in a Cop Killer position. Quackenbush victory rolls his way free. Hero kicks out and dropkicks Quackenbush in the skull of his head. Quackenbush throws a palm strike from the mat. Hero dropkicks him again. He throws some fists. Quackenbush avoids an armdrag and rolls Hero up for two. He goes for a headscissors. Hero counters with a chokeslam of all things. He keeps on Quackenbush with strikes and sends him back first to the corner. Hero gives him a running kick to the chest. He comes back in from the apron and Quackenbush drills him with a palm strike. He windmill chops Hero like a madman in the corner. He clotheslines Hero into a bulldog. He comes off the top with a Swanton bomb. Hero catches him coming off the ropes with a boot to the stomach. He gives him a swinging neckbreaker. Hero gives him a cravate neckbreaker for two. Hero toys with Quackenbush, slapping him repeatedly on the top rope. He applies the cravate again. Quackenbush spins out of it and spikes Hero on his head with a huracanrana for two. Hero counters Quackenbush’s suplex with a reverse release suplex. He calls for the Hero’s Welcome. Quackenbush counters with a reverse brainbuster for two. He also gets two with the Quackendriver III. He tries a palm strike. Hero blocks it and places Quackenbush on his shoulder. He spins him out into a Hero’s Welcome: Championship Edition. Quackenbush kicks out. Out of nowhere, headbutts are thrown by both guys. Hero puts on a cravate. Quackenbush headbutts Hero off the ropes. He drives his knees into Hero’s chest. He puts on a new submission hold where his leg traps Hero’s arm and he ties up his legs. Hero taps out at 18:03! This was an awesome way to end this issue. Both guys knew each other so well that Hero knew to target Quackenbush’s back and Quackenbush knew he had to bring something new to his arsenal to win. Adding moves like headbutts and chokeslams showed this as well. This was really well done and is unquestionably one of the most important matches in CHIKARA history. ***¾

Mike Quackenbush gets on the microphone and thanks the fans.

We then see Quackenbush backstage. He goes through his and Hero’s history as it pertains to CHIKARA; Hero being on the first CHIKARA card and then joining CHIKARA as a trainer in 2004. He knows that he and Hero are a lot alike; they study a lot of tapes and both want to be the best wrestlers. Because of that, he knew Hero would be ready for his usual submissions. He knew tonight he had to bring something special to the table and not insult Hero’s intelligence. Forever, that hold will be known as the CHIKARA Special. Now that he knows Hero can be put down with it, he’s going to teach it to everyone he can. He feels that’s just the first in a long line of victories that will come from that hold.


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