Return of the Son of the International Invasion of the International Invaders – First Stage

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Hellertown, PA – 8.19.2006

Commentary is provided by Bryce Remsburg, Arik Cannon, Excalibur, Leonard F. Chikarason, Chris Hero, Larry Sweeney, Shane Matthews, and UltraMantis Black.

Darin Corbin {NSE} & Ryan Cruz {NSE} vs. El Hijo del Ice Cream {IC} & Ice Cream Jr. {IC}

Jr. jabs Corbin with his cone to break a headlock. Corbin takes him over with a pair of armdrags. Hijo and Cruz tag in. Cruz mocks some of Hijo’s fancy footwork. Hijo puts on a side headlock. Cruz drops down but Hijo picks him up to put the headlock back on. Cruz trips him but then gets booted away. Hijo kips up right into Cruz’s headlock. Cruz blocks a hip toss. He snaps off two armdrags. Hijo blocks the third and stomps Cruz on the back. Cruz sends him out with a toreador. Cruz dives right after him. Jr. looks for a dive. Corbin cuts him off. He and Cruz give him a double gut buster and stereo dropkicks to the side of the head. Hijo breaks Corbin’s cover. Hijo kicks Corbin out. He pinches Cruz in the buttocks and smacks him in the face. He gets two with a senton. Los Ice Creams cut the ring in half to wear Cruz down. They give Cruz the Ice Cream Sandwich. Hijo taunts Corbin after giving Cruz the Ice Cream Sandwich (with Jr.) and El Asesino. Cruz boots Hijo a few times before sunset flipping him. Hijo rolls through with a low dropkick. Cruz breaks a full nelson attempt. He goes to the apron to tag in Corbin. He Finlay rolls Jr. Cruz comes off the top with a splash while Corbin gives Hijo a back cracker out of the corner. The North Stars dropkick Lose Ice Creams into each other, sending Jr. to the floor. The North Stars hit the Everlasting Gobstopper (Cruz monkey flipping Corbin into the corner) for two. Jr. drags Corbin to the floor. Hijo gives Cruz the Two Scoop Slam. Corbin pitches Hijo to the floor as Jr. pours sprinkles on the canvas. Corbin gives Jr. a spinebuster on the sprinkles! Jr. falls victim to the Cruz Control, giving the North Stars the pin at 13:32. This was a perfect blending of good wrestling and comedy. Los Ice Creams got in all their signature stuff without going overboard and the North Stars were quite beloved so the crowd response was on point. **1/2

Larry Sweeney is worked up and nervous because he has Fire Ant on deck for tonight. He called up Mama Sweeney and asked her what to do. She told Sweeney to tape up (Sweeney has taped up wrists and fingers) because she knows Fire Ant is a fighter. He’s been praying and doing his training and thinks he can secure the victory.

Fire Ant {C} vs. Larry Sweeney

Sweeney is dressed for a street fight; jeans with purple kneepads, a shirt with the sleeves cut off, and taped up hands/wrists. Sweeney panics and gets between the ropes when Fire Ant goes for a lock-up. Sweeney claims Fire Ant pulled his hair (he didn’t). Sweeney of course grabs Fire Ant’s antennae when they lock up again and slaps Fire Ant in the face. Sweeney brings Fire Ant to the mat in a knuckle lock. Fire Ant kicks Sweeney’s arm away and uses the ropes to armdrag Sweeney to the floor. Sweeney grabs the microphone. He tells Fire Ant he came to the ring, not for a flippy contest. With that, he goes backstage. Suddenly Eddie Kingston’s music and Sweeney comes out with a bandana on his face and his stomach hanging out, clearly mocking the King of Diamonds. Sweeney even cuts a mocking Kingston promo. Sweeney asks for the match to be re-started. Sweeney throws strikes at Fire Ant in the corner. He snapmares him and throws kicks at Fire Ant’s back. Sweeney yells “Holla at yo Boy” and drops an elbow. This brings out Eddie Kingston ringside. Sweeney doesn’t seem afraid. Fire Ant rolls him up for two. Sweeney hits the Backfist to the Future. He does a hip swivel towards Kingston, which brings Kingston into the ring. Sweeney immediately bails. Fire Ant doesn’t like that Kingston interjected himself and gives him a shove. Kingston boots Fire Ant and pitches him to the floor, ending the match by DQ at 7:28. This was completely used for set-up for tomorrow’s night match between Kingston and Sweeney. While this was a total throwaway bout, it does make me really look forward to that match tomorrow night. N/R

Kingston begs for Sweeney to get into the ring. He even lays down, offering Sweeney a free shot. When Kingston slowly sits up, Sweeney runs away again.

Retail Dragon vs. Dr. Cheung {PT}

This is a rematch from “Extra Credit”. Cheung laughs as he shoves Dragon to the corner. Dragon’s shoulder block attempts are futile. Dragon does however end a lucha sequence with a quesadora armdrag. He leg trips Cheung only to get shoulder tackled. Cheung lands a senton. Cheung pumps his shoes before delivering the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cheung gets two with a sit-out hiptoss. Dragon blocks a spin-out slam with a crucifix pin. Cheung kicks out and lariats Dragon. Cheung Doctor Bombs Dragon into the corner. He puts on a lazy looking STFU. Dragon grabs the ropes to break it. Dragon wiggles out of the FU. He dropsaults Cheung to the floor. Cheung follows with a twisting moonsault. Back in the ring Cheung catches Dragon’s crossbody attempt. He drops him with a Rydeen Bomb for two. Cheung misses a corner splash. Dragon puts Cheung on the top rope. Dragon blocks a super Doctor Bomb with a top rope hurancanrana. That gets him the pin at 7:13. It’s so weird seeing Cheung use Cena’s big moves and not get the win. While the finish was pretty nifty, this never got all that exciting, or really, out of first gear. *1/2

UltraMantis Black and Hydra are stirring an unholy brew. Mantis give it a test sip and hates it. It turns out Hydra messed up and got the wrong pot (which is labeled “Steamed Clams.” This reminds me of the best Simpsons bit ever.) He is facing Tex Benedict tonight, and says he make Benedict taste his unholy swill.

UltraMantis Black vs. Tex Benedict

Benedict is a skinny English fellow. Benedict puts on a wristlock. He rolls with Mantis when Mantis tries to escape. Benedict flips him to the mat and puts on a top wristlock. Mantis grabs the ropes and consults with Hydra. Benedict cradles Mantis for two when going for a backslide proves difficult. Mantis rolls out to put down Benedict’s cheering section. Hydra massages his right foot while resisting his urge to bite it. Mantis puts on a side headlock. Benedict slips out and puts on one of his own. Mantis can’t escape the same way. Benedict rolls up Mantis for two. Benedict ducks a clothesline and rolls up Mantis for two. Benedict leapfrogs over Mantis and rolls in the Black Pool Ball. Mantis can’t seem to figure it out. Hydra comes in with Mantis’ staff. While Derek Sabato is disposing of it, Hydra helps Mantis pick up Benedict for a tandem modified powerbomb. Mantis only gets two with a neckbreaker. Mantis gives him a double underhook powerbomb. Mantis misses a corner attack. Benedict clotheslines Mantis through the ropes. Mantis side steps a missile dropkick. Mantis chokes him on the bottom rope. He ties up Benedict, locking his left leg and cranking his neck. Mantis uses the ropes for some extra leverage. Benedict gets a boot up in the corner. He double sledges Mantis’ arm and jams it across his shoulder. Benedict digs his forehead into Mantis’ arm. He stomps on Mantis’ arm after turning it upright. He legdrops the arm off the top rope for two. Benedict delivers the Benedict Solution( an Air Raid Crash). Hydra pulls Sabato’s leg to break the count. Mantis O’Conner rolls Benedict and hooks his tights for the pin at 11:04. I was waiting for Benedict to do something really spectacular. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a really solid wrestler, but there was nothing truly outstanding about him. The cheap ending left me feeling a bit hollow but it’s not as if the match was totally amazing before that anyways. **1/2

Shane Matthews is still on the shelf. He blames Equinox for this. He says Jagged will give Equinox his just deserts. Jagged then brings us back to 1989. That was the year he learned to ride a bike sans training wheels. He makes a metaphor about falling down off the bike when you first lose confidence. That won’t happen to him tonight, as he plans to defeat Equinox and earn a shot at the Young Lions Cup. They then leave the bathroom in which they were shooting the promo.

Equinox vs. Jagged {2.0}

The winner of this match gets a shot at the Young Lions Cup tomorrow night. Shane Matthews is in Jagged’s corner with cane in hand. Jagged hurts himself on a headbutt. Equinox ducks a few clotheslines. The confusion causes Matthews to accidentally hit Jagged in the back with his cane. Equinox alita’s Jagged to the corner. Equinox toreadors him to the floor. Jagged walks away to avoid a dive, but Equinox follows him and comes off the top and gives Jagged an alita on the floor. Matthews hooks Equinox’s leg with his cane so that Jagged can knee him in the side of the head. Jagged gives him an inverted brainbuster for two. He drops an elbow off the second rope for the same result. Jagged whips him to the corner. Equinox gets his boots up in the corner. Jagged still gives him two reverse snapmare drivers. Equinox jumps to the apron. He sunset flips Jagged and takes him down with a neck-tie headscissors. Jagged ducks a clothesline and gives Equinox a Samoan Drop for two. Equinox shoves Jagged off the middle rope. Equinox walks the ropes while locking Jagged’s hand. Jagged distracts Sabato so he can’t see Matthews shake the ropes and crotch Equinox. Jagged drops him with a Gory Catapult for two. Matthews accidentally clobbers Jagged in the head with his cane when he goes for a O’Conner Roll. Equinox follows that with a standing shooting star press for the win at 7:22. As entertaining as Jagged and Matthews are when it comes to talking, Jagged and Equinox really kept their match really basic. It’s also really hard to get into Equinox when he doesn’t talk and has no gimmick to speak of. **

Lance Steel vs. Lance Steel

The losing Lance Steel win be banished to the past, while the other Lance Steel will stay apart of the CHIKARA roster. None of the opening strikes connect. This irritates the “Rudo” Steel. He asks for a handshake. Steel foolishly obliges and gets baited into a clothesline. Steel suplexes him for two. He keylocks the legs and pulls up on Steel’s arms. He gives Steel a side Russian leg sweep. The other Steel tries to fight back. He ends up cradling Steel for two. Rudo Steel gets two with a back elbow. He chokes Steel in the corner. A gutbuster and backbreaker can’t put the other Steel away. He gets a sunset flip on Rudo Steel. Rudo Steel kicks out and delivers a clothesline. He Finlay Rolls Steel and lands a senton for two. Steel blocks a second Finlay Roll and spins Rudo Steel into a Complete Shot. Steel gives him a sit-out hip toss before going for the Boston Crab. Rudo Steel is too difficult, so Steel gives him a slingshot to the corner. The Rudo Steel slingshots Steel into Bryce Remsburg. He knees Steel in the groin behind his back. The Rudo Steel puts the other Steel in a Boston Crab. The other Steel taps out at 6:59 and will now be banished to the past. That was a pretty nothing match for a feud that was so well built up and had a stipulation so big. Color me disappointed. *3/4

The Tecnico Steel removes his wrist gauntlets, his armor and kneels before the Rudo Steel. Rudo Steel gives him some sort of insult as he’s leaving, which I could not hear clearly.

Claudio Castagnoli calls himself the only successful International Invader here this weekend. So far, that’s tough to argue. He was supposed to face Milano Collection AT tonight, but he is missing the show due to an injury. Claudio doesn’t know who his opponent tonight is, but he’s certain he will win. Why? Because he’s 6’5’’, and his opponent is not. This thought calls for an evil laugh.

Leonard F. Chikarason brings out the infamous hat to choose Claudio’s opponent. Reckless Youth is the first name pulled. Bryce alerts us that he is not here. The second name chosen is Twiggy. Twiggy is here! He seems surprised that he was the one chosen. Out from behind however comes Reckless Youth! He IS here! Claudio is not happy with this, but since Youth’s name was chosen first, he will be Claudio’s opponent.

Reckless Youth vs. Claudio Castagnoli {KOW}

A wristlock exchange starts this contest off. Youth takes Claudio to the mat in a side headlock. Youth kicks Claudio’s leg out into a sunset pin. Claudio reverses the momentum for his own pin attempt. The match resets with a stalemate. Claudio puts on a top wristlock. Youth cartwheels out of an arm whip. He cartwheels Claudio to the ropes and then to the floor with a headscissors. Youth elbow suicida’s Claudio into the crowd of chairs. In the ring, Claudio catches Youth coming off the top rope. Youth counters a chokeslam with an armdrag. Claudio bit boots him right after. Claudio chokes Youth on the bottom and top ropes. Claudio puts his feet on the ropes to add leverage to a headlock. Claudio forearms him in the back of the neck for a two count. Youth side Russian Leg sweeps Claudio into a seated neck and arm crank. Claudio gets to the ropes. He clotheslines Youth immediately upon standing up. Claudio drops multiple elbows for a two count. Claudio whips him to the corner twice. Youth elbows Claudio and comes out of the corner with a tornado Complete Shot. Youth goes for a hammerlock DDT. Claudio counters originally but then eats the Shell Shock for two. Claudio counters an Irish Whip and hits the Match Killer for two. Youth elbows Claudio off the second rope. Claudio gives him the Alpamare Water Slide anyways for two. Claudio comes off the second rope. Youth catches him with a Manhattan Drop. Youth drops him with a Hammerlock DDT. He comes off the top with a frog splash for two. Claudio ducks a clothesline. Youth ducks and nails an enzuigiri. Youth blocks an uppercut and hits another enzuigiri. Claudio fires up. He nails a big time uppercut for the pin at 13:26. Nothing makes me happier than when working over a body part pays off. Claudio had been working over the neck all match and ended up using an uppercut to pick up the victory. Youth always brings the goods and his matches always seem special. ***

Larry Sweeney begins to leave the Commentation Station. Eddie Kingston comes out and goes after him. Kingston shoves Bryce out of the way and chases Sweeney through the back door.

Excalibur is coming for Arik Cannon tonight. Excalibur says they have a history; Cannon asked him for advice many years ago and Excalibur told him to change his shiny black gear to a new color. Now Cannon looks like the Kool Aid Man in his new red gear. Excalibur says not only will he be back in Young Lions Cup contention if he defeats Cannon, but feels he should get a share of Cannon’s Kool-Aid Man t-shirt money since he suggested the color change.

During the entrance for this match, Eddie Kingston and Larry Sweeney are shown brawling out in the crowd and then to the back. Sweeney ends up getting the best of Kingston off camera. Sweeney leaves the building with his luggage while Kingston is shown holding his head and recovering. Excalibur is not happy that all the attention was off of him and demands a re-do in his entrance. Kingston leaves to head after Sweeney once again.

Arik Cannon vs. Excalibur {PWG}

Excalibur is not pleased by the support Cannon is receiving from the crowd. Excalibur also does not like how loose the ropes are, calling them bush league. He makes a “no top rope moves” pact with Cannon. Excalibur headbutts Cannon’s hand in a wristlock. Excalibur even bites the fingers. Cannon puts on a front chancery to block a cross armbreaker. Cannon puts on his own wristlock. Two armdrags, a back elbow and a chop give Cannon control. He ducks a clothesline and hits a swinging neckbreaker. Cannon gets two with a suplex. Excalibur rolls to the floor after eating a haymaker. Excalibur grabs some money from a fan’s shoe and sticks it in his tights. Excalibur throws Cannon head first to the mat. A small jab and double knees to the shoulder blade get Excalibur a two count. Cannon gets his elbow up in the corner. He comes off the second rope with an elbow to Excalibur’s shoulder blades. Cannon and Excalibur trade chops. Cannon delivers a Saito suplex. He misses the Glimmering Warlock. Excalibur German suplexes him for two. Cannon blocks a Heart Punch with a Backslider. Excalibur picks him up in the hopes for a Tiger Driver 98. Cannon picks up Excalibur and brings him into a bridging pin for the victory at 8:46. This was some solid back-and-forth wrestling with two really entertaining personalities. This makes me wish Excalibur had stuck around CHIKARA more than he ended up doing. Excalibur throws the dollar bill he previously stole into Cannon’s face after the match. **3/4

Mike Quackenbush, Jigsaw & Shane Storm are standing together backstage. Jigsaw’s still on a high from his victory over Icarus in their Mask vs. Hair match last month. Quackenbush starts to verbally run down Akuma when Arik Cannon walks in. He’s sad that Jigsaw and Storm didn’t take him up on his offer to be a partner in their six man tag this month. Arik Cannon offers his services again for an eight man tag either tomorrow night or next month. All three guys are already in scheduled bouts so it won’t work out. Cannon says maybe next time and wishes them luck. With Cannon gone, Quackenbush says he still does not trust him.

Mike Quackenbush, Jigsaw & Shane Storm vs. Chris Hero {KOW}, Icarus {F} & Gran Akuma {F}

Icarus is wearing a towel on his head. Storm takes it off right away to reveal his bald head. Storm uses the towel for multiple armdrags, and then snaps the towel into the back of Icarus’ head. Icarus runs around the building screaming in pain. Hero and Jigsaw aggressively look for control of a headlock. Hero blocks a monkey flip but gets headscissored to the corner. Hero trips him. Jigsaw hits a basement dropkick and gets two with a folding press. Quackenbush and Akuma tag in. Quackenbush controls him by the arm. He sweeps out Akuma’s leg after a Manhattan Drop. He sends Akuma out with an armdrag. Hero uppercuts him. Quackenbush hooks Hero’s arms. Akuma comes in and keeps accidentally attacking Hero. Quackenbush sits down to avoid a double Irish whip. Quackenbush flips Akuma over and arm whips Hero across the ring. Both of them and Icarus miss their splash and senton attempts. Storm and Jigsaw come in to send the Kings of Wrestling out with triple dropkicks. Triple dives then follow. In the ring Quackenbush drops his knees onto Icarus. Storm cartwheel splashes onto him for two. Jigsaw strings a stomp and senton together for two. Akuma tags in. He and Storm each get in a shoulder block. Storm lands a dropkick and headscissors. Quackenbush kicks Akuma’s leg while Storm holds onto his headlock. Akuma gets arm whipped to the floor. Quackenbush armdrags Hero. Hero trips him but gets caught with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Quackenbush rolls him while hooking Hero’s arm for two. Hero blocks a headscissors with a backbreaker. F.I.S.T. and Hero wisely isolate Quackenbush and target his bad back. Quackenbush gets lucky when they foolishly boot him out of the ring. Storm however gets trapped by them pretty quickly. Storm at one point manages to slip out to the floor.

Jigsaw is ready to pounce but gets caught with a sole butt from Hero upon entering the ring. You would be right in assuming that F.I.S.T and Hero would bully Jigsaw in their half of the ring. Hero whips Jigsaw to the corner. He dropkicks Icarus off the apron. Hero pops him up, but Jigsaw lands on his feet and tags in Storm. Storm gives Akuma a DDT for two. Quackenbush slaps Icarus’ back. Icarus gives him a backbreaker. Quackenbush blocks his Shiranui. Storm German suplexes him. Akuma hits a missile dropkick, then eats another DDT from Jigsaw. Hero cravate suplexes Jigsaw right on his head. Quackenbush palm strikes Hero to the floor. Icarus reverse suplexes Quackenbush. Storm hits That Japanese Move onto Icarus. Akuma gives him a crucifix driver. Hero boots Jigsaw out after Jigsaw superkicks Akuma. Quackenbush gets two with a crucifix pin on Hero. Akuma gets two with the Yoshi Tonic on Quackenbush. Icarus spears Storm after Storm puts Hero on the top rope. Jigsaw tries for the Leap of Faith. Hero holds onto him so both Icarus and Akuma can dropkick him. Hero powerbombs Jigsaw off the top rope. Quackenbush breaks the pin. Jigsaw enzuigiri’s Akuma into Storm’s Air Raid Crash. Quackenbush comes off the top with a swanton bomb for two. Quackenbush knee strikes Icarus to the floor. Hero elbows Quackenbush out. Jigsaw sets up Icarus for the Jig N’ Tonic. Hero kicks Jigsaw so that Icarus can give him the Wings of Icarus. Hero gets the pin with a standing moonsault at 25:32. This is the third show in a row Hero has won with simple moves. He won with the standing moonsault against Brandon Thomaselli and a right hand punch against Storm. I think it’s nifty to try and make simple moves a finish, but when it comes after everybody has hit their big finishing moves it loses its effect. This was just about as good as all the other CHIKARA vs. Kings of Wrestling trios matches. ***1/2

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